3 women share their infertility struggles

BY KIMBERLEY HIBBERT

Monday, July 09, 2018

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INFERTILITY is characterised as the inability or failure to establish a clinical pregnancy after 12 months of regular, unprotected sexual intercourse or due to an impairment of a person's capacity to reproduce, either as an individual or with their partner.

Many women face this nightmare and often feel like they are alone in the struggle to conceive, maintain a healthy pregnancy, and bring home a baby after nine months.

Unfortunately, this is a pretty common issue affecting women who all share the same heartache.

However, they say that part of overcoming is by the word of your testimony, and below, three women share theirs.

KM, 37:

I was trying from 2008. After we got married it took five years. I monitored my cycle and did lots of tests — both my hubby and I. It was a roller coaster of emotions. I was depressed when my period came around; I feared my husband would get a child outside. I stressed about it and wondered whether I could ever conceive or would have to adopt. Then the questions from friends and family as to when I would be having a baby started coming. Sex is not fun when you are trying to conceive. You can't even enjoy the moment. I tried medication though. I tried Clomiphene and conceived twice with that drug and also miscarried twice. I also tried other medication like Metformin and Vitex. Then my diet changed and I just stopped stressing about it. When I left a stressful job that I had, that's when it happened naturally. Today we have three wonderful kids.

EH, 32:

My husband and I were together from high school. My mother feared I would get pregnant early and I was put on contraceptives. When we left high school we got married pretty young and of course at the time we were not thinking about starting a family, but we discussed what we would like our children to be called when they came. For years they never came and it depressed both my husband and I who is a soldier. There were many miscarriages too. Needless to say, he began confiding in another woman and told her how it affected him, and he shared our plans with her. Lo and behold she became pregnant and named the first child just what we had discussed as a couple. That tore me apart. I became depressed and even felt suicidal. Then he and the woman had a second child together. Eventually we decided to work on our marriage and after trying again I got pregnant, and today we have a son. I understand how other women feel as infertility can really destroy families. Yes, [cheating] is a decision a man makes, but people have their breaking points. A child definitely doesn't hold a man, because he still didn't stay with that other woman. But I believe had I conceived early, even if he cheated, it may not have been to the magnitude that happened.

AO, 42:

My husband and I have been married for 14 years and to date, there have been no children. I am grateful that as Christians he has not gone outside and got a child, but I still fear that. I have been pregnant three times before, one even being a phantom pregnancy. I never even knew that existed till my stomach grew very large and ultrasounds upon ultrasounds showed there was no baby. That was devastating, I had false hope as I believed it was clearly a mistake. Eventually I had to accept that there was no baby. I have to deal with questions from my church folk, my family, my co-workers, neighbours, and people who know me and genuinely say, “When unnu starting unnu family?”

Then there are the dreams I have that I have my family around, or I am pregnant and wake up drenched in sweat. Sometimes I wonder what sin I committed why for years I have been unable to conceive. I feel indifferent about it and at times I try not to think about it. I have even stopped trying the medication. But I can say, I ultimately see it as a test of my faith and how much I am willing to trust God.

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