SIDE orders like coleslaw, fries, salads or mashed potatoes are nice little extra treats that we like to order along with the main course, but they are rarely ever the reason we visit the restaurant. And if one day we decide to watch our weight or our budget, it is generally understood that the side order will have to be cut.
The same rule applies to relationships. These fun relationship 'extras' can become such a habitual choice on the menu that it feels like part of the main course. But, if something should suddenly happen — death, discomfort or discovery — the man will not be able to have his cake and eat it too. He will order what he knows is best for his health, pocket and interests in the long term — his wholesome, good ol' wife. But where does that leave his favourite treat? These women share how they handled being booted from the usual order.
Karissa, 26, secretary:
Everything was going fine until his wife got pregnant. We had been together for about two years without any issues, but the moment she got pregnant he decided to be faithful because he couldn't risk hurting her while she was pregnant. I waited around until she had the baby but then she decided not to return to her job, so he ended up having to work more and spend more time at home with the baby. I eventually just moved on, but I can still call on him if I need help.
Tami, 30, remote agent:
I was with this guy for about a year, even though he had a long-term girlfriend. It wasn't meant to get where it did but we were just so compatible. He understood me more than any other man ever did, and he just couldn't get enough of me. Then his girlfriend called me out of the blue one day to ask what was going on between us. I lied and she believed, but there was just too much tension between us after that. I knew he was starting to feel guilty about seeing me, and that phone call from his woman was a wake-up call, so I left before he could leave me.
Nadine, 32, sales:
I didn't even know what I was until it ended. I was out with him at a lounge and a woman walked in, stared at him, then walked out and he ran out after her. He did not come back inside. He later told me that she was his wife of eight years and the mother of his two children, and he couldn't see me anymore because they were working through his affair with me. I still wonder how he pulled it off for nearly two years. I never suspected a thing.
Shanay, 28, freelancer:
COVID-19 caused my sugar daddy to end our affair. He told me in a 'strictly business' tone that he could no longer afford me, because he was cutting back to protect his businesses and family until the economy improves. He even gave me $100,000 'severance'.
Sandy, 25, geriatric nurse:
We were seeing each other for about three years. The situation worked for me because I didn't want a relationship, and the money really helped me to get on my feet after I lost my job. But then one day I noticed that he was moving away from me when he answered his phone, even though he always answered his wife in front of me, even when we were making love. I soon found out that he had a newer side chick. I told him to just keep her and let me go, because number two was bad enough and I wouldn't be number three.