Wife status

All Woman

RADIO and TV personality Khadine 'Miss Kitty' Hylton found herself at the centre of social media controversy a few weeks ago, following comments she made during a segment of her programme Miss Kitty Live . In response to a woman who had been spurned by her mate even after dedicating years of wifely devotion to him, Miss Kitty spoke candidly about the distinction with which she believed boyfriends, as opposed to husbands, should be treated, stating that she would not give “husband treatment” to a careless man who didn't treat a woman well.

In fact she was specific: “Husband eat outta plate, boyfriend eat outta styrofoam or foil paper”, and some sex acts should be reserved for the marital bed so that a woman can preserve herself for whoever marries her.

The backlash was swift and vicious. Both women and men attacked Miss Kitty for her stance, some delivering personal low blows. Many people believed that nothing should be held back when you're in a relationship with someone you love.

So, should a woman perform “wifely duties” for a man she's not sure she has a future with? And when it comes to men, does a woman doing wifely duties advance her status in your eyes?

This is what our readers had to say:

Vaughn, 31, banker:

Of course. If a woman does wifely duties it would up her status and certainly make me respect her more, to be very honest. This shows that she cares, and this is usually an indicator that she wants to take things to another level.

Olando, 27, computer engineer:

A woman performing wifely duties for me definitely ups her status. But she also must understand and know that her progression to being my wife is not based solely on the traditional “wife a yard” mentality. She must know to do stuff without being asked, to prioritise with family in mind. She should be encouraging and supportive so we can be better versions of ourselves.

McWayne, 25, financial analyst:

Certainly, the performance of wifely duties is very important to me. It not only signals the kind of wife that she will be, but the kind of mother to my child or children. This can be an important indicator in also knowing whether she will prioritise the nutritional health of the children, for example, whether she will be able to take care of our children's clothes, will she care to teach them values on home-making... No matter how educated we are, these matters are equally important. Of course, I will play a similar role.

Jason, 23, university student:

The fact that she does wifely things would not be the reason I marry a woman, but because these things complement all the other things that we have in the relationship, like love, respect and trust.

Clifton, 38, butcher:

Well, if she is good enough to cook my food, wash my clothes and iron them, then she is worthy of being my wife. Too many men nowadays want to use people's girl children when they know they have no intention of getting married to them. Of course, everything else must balance out. If we genuinely cannot see eye to eye and the relationship is going to fail, then I wouldn't go through with it. But I wouldn't just get up and leave my woman for a fresher thing or a prettier girl, and I don't know how some men do it.

Macky, 40, artist:

I have been living with my girlfriend for four years. We recently got engaged, but we have been together for seven years. Honestly, looking at the place I am in my life, if my partner didn't do wifely duties I would question her commitment to me and to the relationship. In my book, doing these things earns her not just the ring but my respect as well.

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