On dating a friend's ex

By Miss Kes

Thursday, September 20, 2018

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There is a belief that you have no control over who you fall for, even if who you fall for was a friend's ex. How appropriate is this? Several women were bold enough to share their experiences and the impact it had on their lives.

CM:

I saw him seven years after their break-up and I fell for him and we hung out several times until I decided to tell her about it. She said she was cool with it because she was married with three children by then, so she said she approved. We dated for a year then we got engaged and I found out recently that I am pregnant. All of a sudden, drama! She started to vent on Facebook and I had to cut that friendship short. I know it is awkward for her but she said she was fine with it and I do love him and we have an amazing relationship. I have zero regrets about it.

Karene:

I dated a friend's ex after I asked her if she approved and she said yes because that was it in the past. Then it started becoming a huge deal for her. She basically blocked me from messaging and calling her, so now I am just living my life like it is golden and minding my business until she is ready to talk. I know how she feels but she left him years ago and has moved on with a new man and seemingly looks happy. So I thought she really was okay with it, but clearly she wasn't.

Suzette:

I honestly would feel some type of way should a friend date my ex, but I did it. The thing is, I haven't said anything to her about it; it is fairly new. I know I need to tell her but I am fearful I will lose my friend of 17 years. I am in love with her ex and that is the truth.

PT:

My experience cost me a friend but I am still with her ex because I really like him and he makes me happy. She dumped him and I saw treasure where you saw trash.

MH:

I am secretly with my friend's ex but what she doesn't know won't hurt her. I do not plan to tell her about us anytime soon because I know it will tear her up, but it is life. I didn't choose who to love, it simply just happened.

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