Easter and my beef with vegetarians

Franklin Johnston

Thursday, April 01, 2010

Vegetarians are a selfish and self-righteous people. God save us from them! Or have I met the wrong lot? But, hold that for now and let's enjoy Easter. This is my time of year primarily because the money men have not figured out how to commercialise the passion of Christ and send us on a guilt trip to buy tons of stuff. Easter eggs and bunnies are enough. The real threat is sport and entertainment where the gorgons lurk under the surface of spectator events - lethal as icebergs.

There is a tussle for the public loyalty between faith and the gorgons, and faith is not winning. The church must do more to protect holy days and the best protection is to occupy them, as commerce may take steps to make the death and resurrection of Christ "sexy" and then it's too late! These days can be saved only if the churches take ownership and use them. Events inside the church building are not enough; we need public spectacle to mark out our ground! There is no vacuum in nature and only by street pageants and massive events in public spaces can the church stake a claim on those days. We need mass celebration or empathy events to engage our people's ingenuity, energy and creativity; the churches can provide this. My Palm Sunday communion was like a fine Spanish Rioja - vintage blood! We started in front of the temple of Tesco - the supermarket giant, and my vicar brought Wimbledon city traffic to a standstill with his usual procession - the donkey, tambourines, singing, etc, and made a triumphant entry into the church 30 minutes later. The buses and taxis were polite (he blesses taxis in the town square once a year), kids tried to ride the donkey and the townspeople surrendered and joined in! Could towns in our Christian land copy this? The vicar claims the town for Christ one day a year. Good move! Don't lock up your values, show them!

Christ arrived in Jerusalem to great fanfare, was crucified by Friday and rose from the dead on Sunday. A week is a long time in politics - it was all politics; they hail you on Sunday and bury you by Friday! God formed the world in seven days, man brought down his son's world in six. Holy week holds the core imagery of our faith. Dates don't matter as when the Bible was written no eyewitness was there - what does it matter? It is all uplifting stuff! As Roman emperors juggled calendars to fit their egos, we respect the message, not the dates. Easter week has highs, lows and miracles. Sunday was Jesus' big entrance, at last the Messiah had come to liberate Jews from Rome. Jubilation! Monday, more hype; Shrove Tuesday (fat Tuesday, Mardi Gras) the last day of revelry; Ash Wednesday, stations of the cross; Maundy Thursday, vintage wine and cheese for a last supper and foot washing - a bit heavy for me; then Friday, blood and betrayal; pure grief and disappointment! Hero to Zero in six days! Friday is a workday in the UK so my vicar loops a one-hour service over the day so people can pop in anytime and feel the spirit. I got white lilies, hot cross buns, stuck my palm cross on the fridge and found my repose in this ritual. People need ritual!

We get a "Happy birthday!" hail and we feel good, and if a friend throws a party for us - another ritual - we feel better! Churches should get together, organise street parades as Filipino and Latin Christians do (they even nail men to crosses). The church must claim the days or lose them by default to the money spinners. Celebrate the triumphant entry; then after Shrove Tuesday, control the streets with solemn costumes, masques and dances of the Passion. Why can't the Cross Roads, Mandeville or Half-Way-Tree ministers fraternal occupy public spaces and streets with pageants for Christ? Why imprison this triumphant event in a church building? Jesus brought his city to a standstill! In freezing weather my vicar and others paraded over the town to their several churches.

One day our churches will petition Parliament to end encroachment on holy days and fail, as they did not claim them. Use it or lose it! If Sunday and Easter continue with boring, low-key church rituals, then don't blame sport and commerce for snatching them for public events. To sing, dance; costumery and props are all aids of ritual. The church should reinvent its rituals; invest in public spectacle to mark some feast days. Leave the multi-million dollar vanity buildings, the designer suits, dresses and take to the streets! The events of Easter are the most spectacular in the Christian calendar. Do we have designers, performing arts gurus and choreographers in our churches, to produce massed bands, choirs, sets, parades, film and video in every town? Rituals around birth, death, etc, are important and so is mass ritual around the faith. In Haiti, bulldozers interred thousands in mass graves--sadly with no ritual. A funeral is a most important ritual which allows the living to grieve, commiserate and heal! Churches may not agree on everything, but together they can showcase the shared message of Easter in the streets. This is not an option for the chureh, it's self-preservation!

Vegans

Now for my rant on vegetarians. Why are vegetarians intolerant exhibitionists who think they are better than those who eat meat? Meat eaters never advertise themselves or impose their choices, vegetarians feel the need to flaunt their food choices and lecture us. Why? They are like exhibitionist gay people - in your face! Why do I have to know you are vegetarian? Why announce it? Just live it! They will tell us what they eat or don't eat; they upset the caterer, the budget, other guests and the hosts. They are obnoxious! A meat eater never does this. He eats what he can from what his hosts have and is at ease. He does not ask, where are the steaks? Vegetarians or vegans always preach - all life was made to eat plants - how do they know? Did God have a private meeting? Can he explain why God made meat-eating plants? No! What about meat-eating animals? No! Pick the flippin' peas and carrots out of the stew, eat them with the rice and be happy! It's not your last supper! Some have a medical reason for food choices - a shellfish allergy - but most are just a lifestyle choice. Why does a vegetarian restaurant not serve meat dishes, but a meat restaurant serves all options? Why do they discriminate? Why restrict choice? Most vegetarians provide no meats at their functions yet are most objectionable and arrogant when specific vegetarian options are not on a meat eater's event menu. Vegetarian choice is the latest one-upmanship! The human race grew on meat! God made the world for man's use, so let's eat everything! Have a conscious Easter!

Collister

Roy Collister has a gift of finance acumen. When last we chatted, he was frail, but sharp as a tack and full of ventures. His honours are well deserved! Much respect!

Dr Franklin Johnston is an international project manager with Teape-Johnston Consultants, currently on assignment in the UK.

franklinjohnston@hotmail.com

POST A COMMENT

You must first register and then login to be able to post a comment.

HOUSE RULES

1. We welcome reader comments on the top stories of the day. Some comments may be republished on the website or in the newspaper – email addresses will not be published.

2. Please understand that comments are moderated and it is not always possible to publish all that have been submitted. We will, however, try to publish comments that are representative of all received.

3. We ask that comments are civil and free of libellous or hateful material. Also please stick to the topic under discussion.

4. Please do not write in block capitals since this makes your comment hard to read.

5. Please don't use the comments to advertise. However, our advertising department can be more than accommodating if emailed: advertising@jamaicaobserver.com.

6. If readers wish to report offensive comments, suggest a correction or share a story then please email: community@jamaicaobserver.com.

7. Lastly, read our Terms and Conditions and Privacy Policy, and before commenting you need to register, conveniently, by clicking the link above.

COMMENTS (13)

Philip Rose
4/3/2010

I am a vegetarian. However, I agree that some of us do try to "lecture" others. But most of the time, when required, all we do is to state that we "don't eat meat". I see nothing wrong with that. Have you ever asked someone for a light for your cigarette and hear the response, "I don't smoke"? Well, I didn't ask if you did! Or, when I sneeze, I hear "God bless you". What if I were an atheist? Should I be offended by having this belief pushed upon me? No! That would make me an idiot.
Also, we are trying to increase choice, not limit it. Being vegetarian is a very healthy lifestyle. Forgive us for trying to share our findings with others and I will forgive you for sharing your beliefs with me.

Keelah W
4/3/2010

To be honest though, I'd really appreciate it if some vegans/vegetarians could just live they lifestyle and hold back on the lectures and waxing on about the life cycle and whatnot.
Anyway, I'm pretty sure the latter was written half-jokingly. It's a provocative piece but if you read it without rancour you'll see he's complaining about "intolerant exhibitionism", not your very existence. , He's not supporting a vegan holocaust or a by-law forcing them to pick peas out of beef grease.

george watson
4/3/2010

You know what? I think you vegans or vegetarians (I don't know if there is a difference nor do I care) are taking yourselves much too seriously. I think the writer wrote more tongue in cheek than anything else. I personally think that he does not care what you eat, whether meat, vegetables or nothing at all.

Philip Rose
4/3/2010

This writers rant on vegetarians wreaks of backwardness, selfishness and plain old stupidity. I hope his aim was to merely provoke a conversation. I would hate to think that someone with "Dr" before his name could be so foolish.

Steppin Razor
4/2/2010

This is definitely an occasion where the writer should keep certain opinions to himself. This article seems to capture the view of many believers of the Christian faith (and other religions for that matter) in suggesting that any non-believers who do not adhere to their choice of religion or dietary habits are heathens and will lead a life of shame and sorrow. As a lifelong vegetarian, I can appreciate the viewpoint that it is not the most convenient lifestyle when food is being prepared by others (such as the catering example). However, does that mean that because of this minor inconvenience, vegetarians should compromise their viewpoint and beliefs? Pick the beans out of the stew swimming in pork and beef grease? Seriously. This article is making irrational suggestions with the sole aim of infuriating people with differing viewpoints. According to the writer, there should never be any attempt by anyone to accomodate vegetarian lifestyles. Dear Sir, listen closely: WE ARE NOT GOING ANYWHERE!

Carlene Johnson-Barnett
4/2/2010

I disagree with the writers views.
Is it that a vegetarian should go out and eat whatever is provided? Isn't that defeating the purpose of being a vegetarian.
I think the writer is very intolerant and should not seek to generalize vegetarians or vegans in regards to them preaching to others to change their eating habits.
Its not a cult its just a choice that we make and choose to live by just as those who choose to go to church and those who don't.
"They are obnoxious! A meat eater never does this. He eats what he can from what his hosts have and is at ease. He does not ask, where are the steaks?"
Isn't it obvious this person that what they eat are being provided but for vegetarians there is hardly any provisions made.
"No! Pick the flippin' peas and carrots out of the stew, eat them with the rice and be happy! It's not your last supper! Some have a medical reason for food choices - a shellfish allergy - but most are just a lifestyle choice."
These statements only show how selfish and snooty you are.
Are you then implying that if the vegetarian or the vegan is not willing to pick the limited contaminated vegetables from meat dishes they should not be a part of social events or should they just take their own food along.
This writer needs to revisit his thoughts and not because he has been established it does not give him the right to openly bash, criticize and falsify a minority group who just chooses an unconventional lifestyle.

Steppin Razor
4/2/2010

Stephen Gunter
4/2/2010

Allen Sneed wrote "Vegetarians think they are better than those who eat meat for the same reason people who don’t rape women think they are better than those who do."
Excuse me, did you just compare meat eaters to rapists? When reading the above sentence you definitely equate the two.
You play heavily on the killing of animals, but are vegetables not also living things? Do they not die before you eat them? Additionally, you say the writer is preachy but you deliver quite the sermon yourself. In fact, your entire reply is littered with examples of why the author labeled vegans condescending. Well done, you have proven his point.

T G
4/1/2010

_/_/_/_/.
Vegetarians are a selfish and self-righteous people. God save us from them! Or have I met the wrong lot?
_/_/_/_/.
You have met the wrong lot we don't care what you eat.
Knock yourself out.
_/_/_/_/.
Vegans
Now for my rant on vegetarians. Why are vegetarians intolerant exhibitionists who think they are better than those who eat meat? Meat eaters never advertise themselves or impose their choices,
_/_/_/_/.
I wonder where are you finding evidence of this?
I have been a Vegan now for maybe 40 years and I sure as hell do care what the next man eat or think that I am any healthier than the next human being.
It would be interesting to find out your let's eat everything includes all, rodents, canine, feline, equine, birds of prey, scavenger birds?
....TG....

Paul Lewis
4/1/2010

I would say the same thing about Christians, who take it upon themselves to loudly condemn others who dont believe accordingly. I am neither Christian or Vegan, however I let each have their choice, as long as it doesn't infringe on my own. I have long been disgusted by preachers on public transportation, Churches and others who make amplfied noise within my earshot. Vegetarians I have no problems with, since anytime they can come overcome my love of jerk pork, with a suitable substitute then I would gladly join them.

Paul Nelson
4/1/2010

Allen Sneed - excellent response to this stupid ranting article littered with exclamation marks and ignorance.
Jamaica is the home of rastafarianism, a vegetarian diet based on health and compassion. What a shame that Mr Johnston has chosen to slate all of us rather than speak to a friend of a friend who may have given him a better idea of what us vegetarians are like. I never preach, and I never go about advertising my peersonal choice, yet as soon as it somes out I constantly have to justify myself to people who eat meat and obviously view my very existence as a criticism of their meat eating ways!!

Allen Sneed
4/1/2010

“Why are vegetarians intolerant exhibitionists who think they are better than those who eat meat?”
Vegetarians think they are better than those who eat meat for the same reason people who don’t rape women think they are better than those who do. I enjoy sex, and I enjoy food. But I think it is wrong to cause others to suffer needlessly just to satisfy my own desires.
“Meat eaters never advertise themselves or impose their choices, vegetarians feel the need to flaunt their food choices and lecture us. Why?”
Not true. Surely you have seen the endless adds for KFC, McDonald’s and Outback Steakhouse that air every commercial break, but perhaps you haven’t considered the fact that the meat and dairy industries, unlike the fruit and vegetable industries, are heavily subsidized by taxpayers – even vegetarians. We don’t have a choice. We pay for your meat and cheese whether we like it or not. And cows’ milk is mandated in public schools even though a large portion of the population is lactose intolerant.
“Why do I have to know you are vegetarian? Why announce it?”
Vegetarians are simply working to even the playing field and increase awareness for a lifestyle that is largely chastised and denigrated. We are the oppressed minority, not you. But ultimately, it isn’t really about you or me. It is about the needless suffering of literally billions of farmed animals. As a vegetarian, I save about a hundred animals a year from needless suffering on factory farms. If I can urge one other person to adopt a vegetarian lifestyle, I have doubled the number of animals saved from needless suffering.
“Vegetarians or vegans always preach - all life was made to eat plants - how do they know? Did God have a private meeting?”
What have you been reading? Vegetarians don’t think all life was made to eat plants. We think that humans have a choice. We can choose to eat meat or we can choose not to eat meat. Many vegetarians (actually I think most people) believe that causing others to suffer needlessly is wrong. Vegetarians choose not to eat meat because we know that we don’t need to eat meat to be healthy and therefore eating meat causes needless suffering. We are simply trying to align our behaviors with our morals.
“Can he explain why God made meat-eating plants? What about meat-eating animals?”
Good question. I’ve always wondered why an all knowing, all loving God would create animals with the ability to suffer and then create other animals who have to hurt and kill them in order to survive. Perhaps God is not all knowing or all loving? Or perhaps the version of God portrayed in the Bible is flawed.
A more naturalistic view would show that animals have evolved various characteristics that have helped them survive as a species. Eating meat certainly is one way to derive the necessary nutrition to survive. But as humans, we have no physiological need to eat meat. In fact, vegetarians are, on average, much healthier than their meat-eating counterparts. So, as a rational human being, rather than a non-rational animal, I have the ability to make a choice. If I were starving, I would eat anything I could get my hands on. But if the choice is between a saturated fat and cholesterol filled hamburger covered in vegetable flavorings like BBQ sauce or ketchup and a veggie burger that caused less suffering to other animals, I choose the veggie burger.
“Why does a vegetarian restaurant not serve meat dishes, but a meat restaurant serves all options? Why do they discriminate? Why restrict choice?”
You seem to have a lot of trouble understanding that veganism is an ethical position for many people. Vegetarian restaurants don’t serve meat for the same reason other restaurants don’t serve aborted fetuses – because they see it is immoral.
Obviously, this moral stance can rile the defenses of many meat-eaters, which is probably a big part of the reason you and others rant against us and call us preachy. But that is just how it is. If you agree that causing others to suffer needlessly is wrong, and you understand that humans don’t need to hurt or kill animals to be healthy, then it is only reasonable for a kind-hearted person to speak out against those who continue to needlessly harm and kill animals.

Richie L
4/1/2010

So now you are on Thursdays?

Do you feel buying into Facebook now is a good investment for the long-run?
	Yes
	No

View Results
Results published weekly in Sunday Finance

Username:
Password:

GCT to go down, white rum prices going up

Easter and my beef with vegetarians