Greetings, Earthlings! Another week has flown past on this planet, but as they say, life goes on. For as long as I have been visiting, I still never cease to be amused and amazed by the behaviour of humans. Once again, I was reminded of paternity issues when a friend of mine tried filing for his 'son' to join him in becoming an American citizen. He did all requisite documentation and just as he was in sight of the finishing line, the DNA test proved that (Maury Povich voice) he was NOT the father. Now, it shocked us all since his 'baby's mama' did not fit the profile of a woman who would give an unsuspecting gent a 'jacket'.

'Jacket' is the local term given to a child who bears one man's name as advised by the mother, but is from the loins of another. 'Jackets' are a fairly common phenomena the world over. How many times have you seen a couple with a child and wondered who the baby looks like? Now that is not to say that a child must look exactly like his/her birth parents as results on DNA testing shows have exhibited. The birth canal is by no means a photocopying machine.

I'm an avid Maury fan and the amount of times I have been convinced that there was no way that man could have fathered the child on my TV screen — since the very white ethnicity of both parents does not vaguely come close to the curly hair and dark tone of the baby — only to wipe egg off my face when the man is indeed proven to be the dad.

But back to the story of my friend. This young woman and he had a long-standing relationship, she never exhibited loose tendencies. She conducted herself in a decent manner, as a matter of fact, she couldn't understand my above-normal bass voice and vulgarity at all, but we managed to get along. When she got pregnant, there was no doubt in any of our minds as to paternity, it was a foregone conclusion that the baby was his. We planned the baby shower and welcomed my 'godchild' into the fold. They have both been good parents by all accounts; even when my friend migrated to find a better life overseas, he never shirked on his 'fatherly' duties and would still help with homework and disciplinary matters via the Internet Skype tool. To her credit, I never saw a 'new boyfriend' snooping around, it has always been her and her child. My 'godchild' turned 10 years old in December 2011.

That equates to 10 birthday parties; seven years of back-to-school anxiety; five years of summer travel to see 'dad'; and seven days of bawling, anger, resentment, and tears for us all when the news broke.

Usually, I am on the side of the woman. I will defend my gender to the death, but wrong is wrong. It is common public opinion that men don't usually stand up to their responsibility as fathers. My friend was an exception to the rule. This was his only child and when you look up the word supportive in the dictionary, his picture may be there.

My opinion is that a man should be allowed to sue for financial restitution and emotional distress when a woman, knowingly or unknowingly, presents him with a jacket. I would be co-claimant in this case because I spent quite a bit for the baby shower and contributed to the birthday parties, and I want back my money. I also want back my time for the occasions I had to do a pick up or drop off to school and extras.

After such deception, how does one move forward? Do you still love and care for this child even though it is not yours? If I were a man and that happened to me, I would demand back my money. Every morsel of food, maintenance, school fees, snacks, utility bills, and phone credit. Everything! Mi want back mi money and a restraining order against the Delilah since I may be prone to violence if and when she tries to come close. Thank God women can't get jackets. I hope for the child's sake some amicable solution can be found to quell the emotional turmoil that has begun.

Let me know what you think elvachatalot@yahoo.com and follow me on Twitter @ElvaJamaica. Have a great weekend folks.

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