Women are soft, mild
Pitiful and flexible.
Thou stern, obdurate,
Flinty, rough, remorseless.
-- Shakespeare, 3 Henry VI, 1, 4
Her voice was ever soft,
Gentle and low,
An excellent thing in a woman.
— Shakespeare, King Lear V, 3
I'M sure most men like the part about women being flexible. But apart from that, there are so many attributes that men want women to have, with a lot of them falling into the categories quoted above. Soft, mild, gentle, with a soft voice.
Which man wouldn't love that in his woman? No man wants a Harridan, a Harpy, a wailing banshee to be his woman, for that can be sheer hell. History is replete with stories of men who were stuck with rough, coarse women and the steps they made to escape them. I even recently saw a story where this man faked his own death just to escape the clutches of his loud, domineering wife.
As strong as men are supposed to be, they will wilt under the onslaught of a woman who is just not built the right way. There was a song from my childhood days by Gene McDaniel that went, "He took a hundred pounds of clay, and said, hey listen... I'm gonna fix this world today... because I know what's missin'... He created a woman, and lot's of loving, for a man."
He, of course, being the Almighty, the Creator. He took a rib from Adam, rolled the clay and constructed what is perhaps the finest form known to man... a woman.
But what if man could build a woman to his specifications? Let's just dream for a moment and conjure up the right vital statistics and perfect attributes that a woman should have. We'll explore this right after these responses to 'Breach of contract'.
The example about the weight gain or loss is not a good one. My wife has doubled her weight in 30 years and I still find her attractive. She eats much less than other ladies I know who have not gained so much weight. The metabolism with people are different. With cars it is a different story.
Breach of contract is so accurate my brother, and I am a man who feels cheated. My wife used to be the hottest woman on the block, and that was what caught my attention. Now she has let herself go and I feel as if I got robbed. My body can no longer respond to her because of her enormous weight gain which has also affected her personality. I don't know what to do.
Regarding your footnote on the frustration with financial institutions, remember that they are businesses operating to make money like any other business. Supermarkets and clothing stores are also in the business to make money. The differences are that these stores sell products that are tangible to the consumer, while banks have nothing to sell but their services, making most of their money from loans, interests and service fees as described in your column.
A few weeks ago, I was in the parking lot of my bank when I overheard a spirited conversation between the security guards and some customers. For some reason, they called me over and put this question to me, "If you could build a woman from scratch, how would you make her?" I had to think a bit, for how do you improve on what the Lord made?
I cautiously remembered the story about a camel being a horse built by a committee. They took a perfect horse and changed, adjusted, modified, until they came up with a camel. And we all know that a camel cannot compete with a horse in the looks department.
Anyway, I gave it a whirl with my suggestions and got plenty handshakes and backslapping from one of the gentlemen. Apparently, my views and his were the same, which in effect were, "She'd have to be attractive, loyal, faithful, smart and sexy."
The man who shook my hand said that was exactly what he said, but he used the word 'freak' in bed rather than sexy. "What's the point in building a woman from scratch if you don't include a little freakiness in her?" Good point, for with all the great attributes of a woman, being sexy has to be a part of the mix.
Now, in no way was my answer in order of importance or priority, but they were all important, and one may very well impact on the other. For example, if she's a freak, but not faithful, then you'd be in a whole mess of trouble, for she would take that freakiness and share it with every Tom, Dick and Harry... plus Joe.
So if you really think about it, being faithful is mighty important. No man wants to know that his woman cannot be trusted. No man wants to know that as his back is turned, his woman will give away the goodies to his...
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