Dear Editor,

This is an open letter to Michael Dingwall re his apology to Britain's deputy PM in the Observer of May 28. Mr Dingwall, you should have written your letter this way:

"Let me, Mr Michael Dingwall, on behalf of the corrupt, unproductive, enslave-minded, docile, ignorant modern slave-catching people of Jamaica, who are in the majority, apologise to the British deputy prime minister for Mr Henry's ill-begotten, ambitious attempt to obtain payment for work for which our forefathers have already been paid.

"Mr Deputy Prime Minister, we the corrupt, modern-day, slave-catching people of Jamaica have already got fat from our corrupt practices in Jamaica and as such, we are in no further need of a lump sum from the land of our most esteemed King James.

"Please accept our sincere apologies for Mr Mike Henry's ambitious attempt to be rewarded for the slave-trade, which was an amicable agreement between good European Christian men and corrupt African leaders.

"While at it, let me also say that we the docile, ignorant, modern-day, slave-catching people of Jamaica are gracious for your annihilation of the Tainos/Arawak Indians, now we have Jamaica all for ourselves. You can bet those savages were deserving of their faith.

"Let it be known, Sir, that your people were instructed by God to rule and conquer, and for this we can see the wonderful result of your godly work: India and Pakistan in unity, Israel and Palestine in unity, Iraq and Kuwait in unity, and the indigenous peoples of North America enjoying their productive life on reservations, and last but not the least, the harmony which now exists in Africa. We Jamaicans should be grateful for all these accomplishments.

"I promise to always depend on you for direction and so at this time, I would like you to send us some of your ethnocentric teachers and missionaries to teach us how to live as true Englishmen and Englishwomen.

"May God continue to bless your great country."

Howard Rennis
hrennis@yahoo.com

Trousers in Denim

Cream of the 'Crop'

Cheeky's World