How to spot a gold digger

Ask Asafa

Monday, March 18, 2013

THIS is a question I get asked a lot by both men and women alike — how do you spot a gold digger?

As men, we're faced with this dilemma on a daily basis — especially the men who are employed, who have their own cars, and worse, their own place. Now imagine if you add being a "celebrity" to this. The digging tun right up.

So I have some quick tips for spotting the women who have one thing in mind — your pocket and what's in it.

1. She tends to be pretty like money or sexy like Rihanna, and she has a large group of attractive friends. She shines like a diamond in a crowd. This is how she'll initially catch your eye.

2. There will be no doubt that she is interested in you. Shy is not her game. She's going to tell you everything you want to hear — nobody in the world is smarter, funnier, sexier than you, according to her. Note: if the shiny exterior and all the right words draw you in and you end up going out with her, then fairly soon into dating look for the following signs:

i) Hints. In a short space of time you will start to hear things like, "My car keep Shutting off y'know. I think I have to take it to the garage. I hope it's nothing big as I just paid my mother's doctor bill." Or she will talk about not having enough for rent, light, water or school fees. In the beginning it's always the basic things.

ii) I deserve it. They actually feel like you're lucky to be with them so for that privilege you must pay. Or if you "have money," you should be spending your money on them. So very soon they will start telling you when and where they've seen something they want you to buy, like clothes, shoes or jewellery. Also, they insist they want to look good for you, so hair and nails need to be done. Many times these discussions take place after you've just been intimate.

iii) Riddle me this. They start asking you lots of questions about material things. "How much dat watch cost?" "That car pretty eeeh, how much yuh pay for that?" They lay down a million questions to try to figure out how deep your pockets go.

iv) Blank stare. After you go out a couple of times, she never offers, attempts or pretends she is willing to pay or will even leave the tip. She never says thanks, and as a matter of fact, don't be surprised when she invites her friends along. This is especially true for parties. If you are going out and you invite her, inevitably she asks if two of her friends can come as well. She expects you to pay for their tickets and more than likely pick them up.

v) Do what? She doesn't do anything to help you. If she's at your house you won't catch her cooking you dinner, washing the dishes or spreading a bed. She's not gonna be the one to go run an errand if you can't — only if it means that there's some cash in it for her.

Men, be smart about your choices in women. There are some manipulative women out there who are only trying to get close to get what they can out of you, and once you can't fulfil that need, that person will be gone.

Follow Asafa on Twitter @officialasafa, visit his website at or catch him at asafapowell. E-mail him at




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