All Woman

The moment I knew it was over...

By DONNA HUSSEY-WHYTE All Woman writer husseyd@jamaicaobserver.com

Monday, May 06, 2013    

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CALL it woman's intuition, call it wisdom, call it 'once bitten twice shy', whatever it is, some women can readily tell you the moment they knew their relationships were over.

The topic #themomentiknew recently trended on Twitter, where women and men shared their stories of the exact moment they knew they were headed for divorce. The stories ranged from one woman having had the other woman call, to another having the man refuse to visit her after major surgery.

Here, some readers share just when they knew their relationships were over for good.

Roberta M, 42:

I was unemployed for a while and was home taking care of our seven month old baby. My husband worked shifts. For two days he did not come home and for two days I had absolutely nothing to eat. I mean nothing. I was breast feeding and bottle feeding but there was no formula in the house. I had to give my son breast milk round the clock, so imagine just how weak I was. When my husband finally came home he was not in his regular work clothes but was wearing a T-shirt that I had never seen before. His shirt was in a bag covered with grease. I found out he was taking box food — ackee and saltfish — to a girl he was involved with and it spilled on his clothes. So one, I was home with our son hungry and he didn't take food to us, and two, I was now supposed to wash the clothes that got messed up while he was taking food to his other woman whom he valued more than his family. Oh, and the T-shirt he was in belonged to her!

Melissa W, 38:

We were together for three years and he told me one evening that he was going out with someone else and I was not to ask any questions about it because it was not my business. He went as far as to tell me that whatever he did or didn't do was not my concern.

Gwenneth H, 47:

I was with him for 15 years. One day he loaned me his phone because mine was not working. He had locks on his picture files but somehow I got into them. I saw a video of him having sex with a girl in our bedroom. That was the exact moment I knew it was over.

Geraldine R, 36:

When he started walking away from me in order to talk on his phone, and he would whisper. And I heard him end his conversations with 'love you baby'. He never told me that.

Andrea M, 43:

We had one car. I decided to drive to work one day and he decided to drive too. We ended up in a tussle and he took away the keys. I got them back. When I went out and started the car he came out and grabbed the keys. I decided to take a taxi. When the taxi came he pushed me down in front of the car, which had other passengers in it. Once I saw that disrespect I knew it was over.

Camille F, 51:

After four years I just knew the relationship was going nowhere. I was not being emotionally satisfied and one day I heard the song 'Til I can make it on my own by Tammy Wynette and just decided that it was time to go.

Lisa M, 37:

When I realised that the things that he did that used to hurt me didn't hurt me anymore. And I started to judge and criticise everything he did. So the little things that were cute just weren't anymore.

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