All Woman

Why you should forgive your lying, cheating, no-good ex

Donna Hussey-Whyte

Monday, October 08, 2012    

Print this page Email A Friend!


MANY persons become so bitter after things end that they find it near impossible to forgive their exes. Some are so traumatised by the events leading up to the break-up, and then having to go through the different stages of grief that come with the separation, that they want nothing more than to see their exes pay dearly for putting them through such pain.

But while forgiveness isn't always easy, many experts recommend going the biblical route in order to cleanse, and forgive those who "sin against you".

"Forgiveness teaches us humility by giving us the opportunity to remember that we, too, mishandle others in relationships intentionally and unintentionally," life coach Cheryll Messam said. "And so we live our lives also in need of and benefiting from the forgiveness of others towards us."

The life coach endorsed these seven reasons why you should forgive your ex.

1. Forgiveness benefits you more than the one who is forgiven. You may even discover an inner strength you never knew you had, that allows you to deal with the situation with a smile rather than in pain.

2. You will feel a sense of freedom to move forward with your life, especially moving forward in a new relationship. The more you hold resentment towards your ex, the more you will be stuck in the past instead of creating a new future for yourself.

3. Forgiveness helps you to reclaim power over your life. Nothing is worse than having someone else dictate when you should be happy and when you should be sad. And so forgiveness takes that power away from the other party.

4. Forgiveness allows you to release difficult emotions, including blame, anger and grief, and allows you to accept things for what they really are.

5. Forgiving someone whom you had a bad break-up with will give you a sense of peace and the ability be kind to those around you instead of always being on the defensive.

6. The best way to get back at an ex is to be happy.

7. Once you have forgiven your ex you can look back at the relationship and learn from it — experience is the greatest teacher.

ADVERTISEMENT

POST A COMMENT

HOUSE RULES

 

1. We welcome reader comments on the top stories of the day. Some comments may be republished on the website or in the newspaper – email addresses will not be published.

2. Please understand that comments are moderated and it is not always possible to publish all that have been submitted. We will, however, try to publish comments that are representative of all received.

3. We ask that comments are civil and free of libellous or hateful material. Also please stick to the topic under discussion.

4. Please do not write in block capitals since this makes your comment hard to read.

5. Please don't use the comments to advertise. However, our advertising department can be more than accommodating if emailed: advertising@jamaicaobserver.com.

6. If readers wish to report offensive comments, suggest a correction or share a story then please email: community@jamaicaobserver.com.

7. Lastly, read our Terms and Conditions and Privacy Policy



comments powered by Disqus
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Poll

Would you enjoy a weekend away by yourself, without the company of your partner?
Yes
No


View Results »

Results published weekly in All Woman


ADVERTISEMENT

Today's Cartoon

Click image to view full size editorial cartoon
ADVERTISEMENT