IN their 56 years of marriage, 86-year-old Valda and 83-year-old Randolph Grey have had their fair share of disagreements. But there is one thing they agree on, and it is that Jamaica should not have sought independence from British rule.

The couple are just as firm in this belief today as they were on that fateful day in 1962, when the country of their birth celebrated its independence from British rule.

Valda Grey was a seamstress then, and despite her doubts about the direction in which the country was going, took their children to watch the fireworks. Randolph Grey, then a police officer, spent that night patrolling the massive crowds that went to see the parade at Up Park Camp in Kingston.

“I was sorry! I tell you the truth, when I saw the English people moving away, I was really, really sorry,” said Randolph, who had been in the police force for 12 years prior to Independence.

“Anybody who coming from before Independence would realise that we don’t really have anything to be proud of,” he said candidly, expressing the opinions of others his age.

The couple first met in 1951 when Valda went to the Half-Way-Tree Police Station to drop off some documents for a ‘Mr Grey’. As it turned out, she was introduced to two other police officers with the surname Grey before Randolph was summoned to the guardroom.

“I see him coming down and I said let me give him the papers and let him look after them for me; and when he walked off, I looked at him again and I left,” recounted Valda, who at the time was married to someone else.

“He got through with the papers and everything, and he came down to the house where I was living and said, well, he had served them,” she said.

Because Valda was married with two children, neither sought any romantic involvement.

It was much later that Randolph started to invite her out and eventually they realised there was a real connection between them. They got married four years after that, when Valda’s divorce from her husband had been finalised.

Few were pleased with the couple’s nuptials, they told the Sunday Observer during a visit to their home a few weeks ago. Some of Randolph’s family members cautioned him against marrying a divorcee with two children. Some of their friends pointed to the fact that he was a Scorpio and she was Virgo, a recipe for disaster. Still the determined couple pressed forward.

“Based on the type of person that she was and the type of person that I was, I think she was the right person,” a still dapper Randolph said.

But the harsh economy, plus the political and social uncertainties of post-Independence Jamaica and the tumultous 70’s made them fear for their family’s future.

Given that neither was pleased with where the country seemed to be going politically and economically, Valda started travelling to the United States to work. Randolph, however, continued to work in the Force as a sergeant and became general secretary of the Jamaica Police Federation. He would spend another 20 years as a police officer before deciding to join his wife in the US when he grew disenchanted with the force and the country of his birth.

“I didn’t like what was going on. We had changed from the English system coming into the Jamaican, and I didn’t like the changes that I saw coming up, and I am glad I left,” said Randolph, who expressed disappointment at what he sees as a high levels of indiscipline in the police force today.

The couple had two children together, which, when combined with the two children from Valda’s first marriage, meant they had a lot of mouths to feed. This meant back-breaking work as the couple struggled to keep their heads above water in the foreign country they now lived.

Valda cleaned the houses of American families during the day and went to nursing school at night, while Randolph worked as a security guard at the famous, now destroyed World Trade Centre in New York, which had just been built around the time they migrated.

Randolph moved on from working at the Trade Centre to the Hotel Delmonico where he spent 23 years, again, as a security guard.

Eventually, Valda graduated from nursing school and got a well-paid job as a qualified nurse.

The couple admitted that living in the US was hard, but they agreed that they would not regret their decision. In fact, Valda said they only returned to Jamaica in 2002 because the cold climate started affecting her physically.

They are now able to live a fairly comfortable life here, she said, only because of their sacrifices and hard work overseas, and the pension she now receives from the US government as a result.

“I left here because I wanted my tomorrow, and that’s what we are living off,” said Valda.

“This country gone, they don’t have any pension here, they don’t have any work, and there is a lot of things happening here. Every one of them [governments] go in, they say they are going to do this and that, and they never [do it], they only fool you,” she argued.

Although they now live in Jamaica, there is no denying where the couple’s allegiance lies. Valda, who even served as seamstress for the late Lady Bustamante, has just about given up on seeing the changes in the country that she would like. In her living room, she proudly displays the image of US President Barack Obama beside her family portraits.

“This is my boss and my president, Mr Obama, I don’t have any boss here,” she declared.

Valda lost her first son over six years ago, but their other three children, grandchildren and great grandchildren all live in the US. One of the couple’s daughters is the chief executive officer in the mayor’s office in New York, the other is a nurse, and their remaining son is in the US army.

Aside from outliving one of their children, the couple has had to see each other through several difficult periods. Valda had three miscarriages, and both had to learn how to deal with the other’s jealous streak, something that at times threatened their union.

“I am jealous and he is jealous too, but he doesn’t show it. I am jealous, and every woman I have to check, every woman,” admitted Valda, who is still a very spirited and well-groomed woman.

She admitted that she and her husband’s, “teeth and tongue meet” (they quarrelled), however, they always shared the same bed at nights.

“Sometimes we would have a war and that one say him going, but when I come home, he is still there,” she joked.

“You always say you are going, but you are always here,” her husband countered.

Looking back on their half a century-long marriage, the couple believes it’s still possible for the union between couples to last.

“Get to know each other before you get married, don’t hurry and rush into it. Not because somebody come and say you look nice you must rush into it, especially now,” advised Randolph.