AS her classmates psyched themselves up for exams, Prescilla Lloyd fought back tears as she struggled to come to grips with the death of her younger brother, Lennox Lloyd.

Two days after a horrific bus crash claimed Lennox’s life in Portmore, St Catherine, Prescilla, 17, bravely tried to mask her despondence as she went to sit paper two of her Caribbean Secondary Educatio Certificate (CSEC) chemistry exam.

Though consumed with grief, the Ascot High School student was determined to complete the paper.

Her passing that exam meant completing another step towards providing a better future for herself and her mother Opal Kerr — a single parent who provided for her three children by bushing and cleaning highways in the Corporate Area and St Catherine.

But minutes after invigilators handed the students their exam papers and instructed them to begin, Lloyd sat staring into space as she slipped into a trance and memories of her brother saturated her mind.

“Me and him were closer more than anybody else, so I could not think straight to do the CSEC,” she told the Jamaica Observer last Wednesday.

“Honestly, I don’t want to talk about it,” she said, hesitant to speak about the horrific accident which has left her family in shambles. However, with some gentle prodding she continued the interview.

“I went the Thursday to try and do the chemistry, but I was in the classroom and I was marking up his name on the paper. I started crying,” she said, explaining that Ascot High Principal Cedrick Murray, having declared that she was in no frame of mind to sit the paper, later escorted her from the room.

“I missed social studies, chemistry, and IT (information technology) paper one. Social studies was on the same day (of the accident) and then I had chemistry and another exam the following Thursday,” she said.

Lloyd was scheduled to sit six examinations; which her principal was confident she would have passed with good grades had she not had to deal with the tragedy. For that reason, Murray has made it his mission to convince the Overseas Examinations Commission (OEC) to allow her to resit the subjects free of cost.

“That is what I am trying to do right now because she take it (Lennox’s death) really hard. She missed a couple of her exams, and if we can spare them (Lloyd’s family) some of the pressure of paying for those exams again then that would be good,” said Murray during a recent interview with the Sunday Observer.

“I mean, her parents don’t have it, so the assistance would be good, especially since it was not her fault. I have made some contact with the OEC and that is what I am trying to do now,” continued the principal, who this year celebrates his 10th anniversary of service to the institution.

Within his tenure, Murray has lost a few students to motor vehicle accidents, including 14-year-old Renae Barnett, who was last year mowed down by a car that was being driven by an elderly man. The incident that cost Prescella’s brother his life occured outside the Maxi Department Store, adjacent to the Portmore Mall, where a passenger minibus in which Lennox was travelling overturned, killing him on the spot. The minibus, onlookers claimed, hit a curb and overturned when its driver attempted to elude members of the Transport Authority.

His students’ deaths have made Murray stronger and more compassionate, he said, adding that he has come to regard the school’s more than 1,300 students as his own.

“We are here to provide a service, we are here to love them. In my time here I have lost three students but I believe that I have saved many more. I lost three, but I think I may have saved thousands,” continued Murray, noting that many of the students were from troubled communities and families.

“It makes no sense to speak of death every day, because death must happen; people are going to die. What we must focus on is the message,’ Murray told the Sunday Observer. “What was Lennox’s message? His message is that we should love unconditionally. That was his message to me.”

“…Lennox challenged [us], but I couldn’t have loved Lennox any less. So the real message is a message of love,” he said.

On Thursday, a female OEC customer service representative informed the Sunday Observer that this year each CSEC candidate was asked to pay an entry fee of $2,605. Candidates were also required to pay a fee of $1,940 for each subject taken.

According to the representative, while provisions are made for students in similar situations as Lloyd, school authorities must follow the requisite procedures to have them resit exams without paying additional fees. The procedures are not normally followed, said the woman.

“They must contact us by letter with their request and then that request is sent to the Ministry of Education. After that we will inform the CXC (Caribbean Examinations Council),” she said. “Many times the principals blame us for taking too long when they are the ones who don’t follow the requisite procedures,” she cautioned.

While Government foots the bill for three CSEC subjects per candidate, the cost of the remaining exam subjects that her daughter has to sit is still prohibitive for Kerr, who makes $1,000 per day in her cleaning job.

“It would make me feel much better, because I know that she would pass her CSEC examinations. I am confident that she would have passed them to how she does her book work and so forth.”

“She was prepared, she does not give trouble at school,” continued Kerr, boasting that her daughter studied very hard for her exams, and was among the best in her class.

“I just have to do my little work so that my children can eat some food. They don’t have a father around them and I don’t want to run away leave them,” she said.

Kerr said she takes care of Prescilla and another daughter who is 20 years old.

In the meantime, the family is still struggling to come to grips with Lennox’s death. The teen was buried at the Meadowrest Memorial Gardens, St Catherine, following an emotional funeral service in Cumberland, Portmore, two Saturdays ago.

“Last night Power of Faith [church] pitched a tent over Waterford for a crusade… When I went over there I saw all of Elvis’s (Lloyd’s pet name) friends and I started to cry, because I know that Elvis would normally come over there with me. I had to come over back (return home),” said Kerr.

Her daughter, despite the setback of being unable to sit the exams she studied so hard for, said she would be grateful for the chance to resit the exams free, since she doesn’t know where her mother would find the money to pay her exam fees a second time.

She still harbours dreams of becoming a registered nurse; dreams she hopes are only temporarily derailed.

In the meantime, the death of her sibling continues to weigh heavily on her mind daily.

“Some of the times I don’t even sleep because I continuously think about it, and because we use to sleep together [shared a bed], each night before I go to sleep I cry,” she said.