This is the state of man: he puts forth

The tender leaves of hope; tomorrow blossoms,

And bears his rushing honours thick upon him;

The third day comes a frost, a killing frost,

And when he thinks, good easy man, full surely

His greatness is a-ripening, nips his roots

And then he falls, as I do.

— Shakespeare, Henry VIII,111,2

HERE we are at yet the start of a new year, 2015, and with it the hopes and dreams of all of us, as we look forward to a positive and fruitful year. We are individuals yes, but we all make up a collective, so if we each do positive deeds, then the nation will be a positive one. Remember, one bee is virtually useless, but a thousand bees can be most productive.

Hold on a minute, I sound like a politician… don’t? The fact is, for some reason, we use the beginning of a new year to somehow do a makeover of ourselves. It’s a new year, a new dawn, a new day, and I’m feeling good, sang Nina Simone. Yes, we will be new persons, doing new things, and achieving greatness that never occurred before.

The silly season has come and gone, so now it’s time for the ridiculous resolutions that people tend to make every year. I say ridiculous because most of them are outside the realm of most persons and are broken before the first month has even finished.

Still, we must resolve to do better and be better persons, even though our quest may border on the ridiculous. But resolutions they are, and we’ll find out about them right after these responses to ‘Schoolers’.

Tony,

I call sports-playing schoolers today ‘itinerants’ because, as you pointed out, they have tentacles rather than roots, and the negative social aftermath of recruitment is obvious, no matter how many of the myopic supporters of recruitment try to defend it. But the schools involved in the practice are also to blame.

The ‘fame’ of sporting victories has become the thing that’s important, notwithstanding the poor exam results. Where/what are our priorities and values? God help us. When it comes to the girls, that’s another matter. Many high school boys have admitted to me that they are literally scared by the brazenness, looseness, and promiscuity and lack of class of so many of the girls they encounter.

Keith Brown

Hi Tony,

I would not have traded the experiences I had in high school, first at Mico Practising Primary, and then at Wolmer’s, also my father’s alma mater. I was not a very good student, nor did I excel at sports, but I made many good friends and developed social skills both in and outside the classroom.

I knew that I had a keen analytical mind, so I joined the chess club and represented the school and was proud to be a Wolmerian. Sadly, there is no such sense of pride or loyalty to their high school in today’s youth.

Wickham

Resolutions have been around for centuries, and just like the passage of time, they pass and are often forgotten. But still, we must cling to some hope for a better future, not only for ourselves, but for our babies to come. Ah babies, those little bundles of joy that light up our lives, and bring so much pleasure to our lives… sometimes.

How about resolving not to have so many babies that are not taken care of? Jamaica has the highest per capita percentage of multiple births in the world, according to The Guinness Book of Records. That’s the most twins and triplets. We certainly know how to multiply and have out our lot.

Sadly, many of these babies are malnourished and uncared for due to the state of the mothers who cannot afford to even feed themselves much less mind baby. And yet they continue to multiply. Be it resolved that all those young girls have less babies and wait until the time is right before they procreate.

All babyfathers resolve to show interest in their offspring and not be hauled before the Family Court for non-payment of child maintenance money. Be it resolved also that babymothers do not exploit the fathers and drive them to rack and ruin. Just a few days ago, I heard this man on a call-in programme contemplating suicide because police were coming to arrest him for non-payment of child maintenance. He was 60 years old, had no job and was desperate. When he offered what he could, the judge said it wasn’t enough, and threatened his arrest.

Now here’s a resolution that’s also made but rarely kept, that of taking care of parents. So often parents grow old and have no means of support but their children. Every year, including this one, many children resolve to spend more time with mama or dads, and provide some dollars too. “I promise this year momma going to see me more regular, and I going to fix her up with some dollars too.” Ridiculous resolution for sure, for it’s broken so quickly.

In most cases people resolve to change themselves, starting with their outward appearance. As the years go by, a little poundage, or more, creeps on. At the beginning of every year, they resolve to lose those pounds. “I can’t make this year start and I don’t do something about this weight.”

So it’s off to the gym, and it’s proven, gym membership is the highest at the start of the new year, for everyone resolves to lose weight, get fit and try to look like a tri-athlete. Fat chance of that happening, and I mean fat. Every year it’s the same resolution, and every year they get fatter and fatter. Ridiculous.

Now, a very important resolution involves dealing with one’s partner. So many people treat their significant other with scant regard, yet promise to improve when the new year dawns. “Honey, I know that the past year I’ve not been the best husband, but I resolve to treat you better this year.” Women have heard this resolution every year from their spouses who never keep it. My answer is, “What gone bad a mawning can’t come good a evening.”

Women, too, have resolved to be less nagging and demanding of their men, and have said, “I know I really nag and give him a hard time, but I promise to change for this year.” Remember the title of this piece is ‘Ridiculous resolutions’, so take them with not a grain, but a pound of salt.

Still, I know women who occasionally give their man a pass and allow him some latitude. “Go ahead, you can look at her, but don’t gaze too long.” Don’t be like that woman in the bottled water commercial who didn’t allow her man to stop and help that damsel in distress.

Men resolve to be more romantic and sensitive and not focus on sex so much. Not every hug should be a prelude to sex, but maybe just hug for hugging sake. Many women complain about this. “Every time him hug me is sumpting him want… him so predictable.” So the man resolves to change, usually at the start of the new year, but by the end of January he comes home late and demands his due. “Woman, submit to your man… assume the position.”

What is interesting is that youngsters do not make resolutions. Maybe because at that age they know that the human condition does not readily lend itself to drastic change. One simply cannot just re-invent oneself and be a new person overnight. Teenagers know that they do what they do, when they want to do it, then the devil takes the hindmost.

Adults are dreamers, and resolutions are but dreams of change. But dreaming can be fun. We can resolve to be more sensitive to each other, more caring and thoughtful. A guy told me how his woman of four years forgot his birthday last year. That sort of thoughtlessness hurts even grown men.

You can resolve to love yourself more, and not depend on the love of others to sustain you. By doing so, you will not be dependent on the emotional fickleness of others. Above all things, to thine own self be true.

Taxi drivers, bus drivers and bikers can resolve to be less reckless on the roads. You can resolve to be faithful to your partner. Hey, it’s a new year and I did label this ‘Ridiculous resolutions’, but ridiculous or not, you can give them a try.

More time.

seido1@hotmail.com

Footnote: What a year went by quickly and now we’re into 2015. Ridiculous resolutions or not, we must cling to hope and faith. “Nothing can become between me and the full prospect of my hopes,” said Shakespeare. It’s a new year, and one which will hold many challenges for us individually and as a nation.

It is my fervent hope that Jamaicans can return to the civility and decency that we were once known for. It still exists in pockets, so there is hope. It’s a tall order, but other countries have done it, so why can’t we?

I wish for all of you a prosperous and productive 2015, and thank you once again for being my partner on this page. For those strangers who come up to me with kind words, I thank you. Praise comes from the unlikeliest sources, as does criticisms. When a coconut vendor can tell me how my words gave him an insight into relationships, I am heartened. God bless you all.