Mosquito get into hot callaloo
The local government election campaign is in high gear and Christmas has come early for some of the more strident and active supporters. Emotions are running high and motorcades, meetings, party colours are everywhere.
Not just the large street meetings, but little caucuses are being held in some of the most unlikely corners. I had the misfortune of running into one of them as I entered an office building normally occupied by a sober and non-political organisation. I was immediately welcomed and hailed as “one of we”, and had to beat a hasty apologetic retreat as I tend to stay away from the partisan excitement.
A similar fun thing happened a few years ago during another campaign when, while driving innocently down the road in an area in which I am well known, I got caught up in the middle of a party leader’s motorcade of about 40 vehicles. There was no room to turn back, and I had to hold my lane. Call it my moment of glory as, for a while, I was being hailed with party cheers and salutes from supporters from one side of the road, while the other side was labelling me with all sorts of names and uncomplimentary epithets. Such a mix up is always good for a laugh. My friends from that part of the world haven’t allowed me to forget the incident.
I thought the debate last week lacked excitement. Maybe it should start earlier for people like me, as towards the end we dozed off. The subject was not exhausted, but we were. I understand I missed the little excitement over the mosquito joke. And I hear the aggrieved party is actually asking for an apology. What will they think of next? Could the winner of the election be determined by the fate of a mosquito that apparently bit one side too hard?
I am reminded of the “mosquito one, mosquito two, mosquito jump inna hot callaloo” old nursery rhyme. We may remember that the mosquito jumped into a hole, but “when him fin’ di hole too deep him jump inna one jeep”. Yes, a jeep. “But di jeep too fas’, so him jump inna di grass”, and guess what happen, the rhyme goes on to say that “an ole man pass and kick him inna him…” you know what. My advice to all the radio talk show protesters is to put that mosquito to bed before it comes back to bite you.
Our debates pale in comparison to the Trump-Clinton play-offs. The aftershocks are going to be felt for a long time and obviously the squabbles will still continue — It ain’t over till it’s over! Unfortunately there is no fat lady to sing. Hillary has folded her tent and has gone into retreat and, I hope, for a well-earned vacation. On the other side, some of the appointments being made support the concerns that the Trump presidency, which caught us unawares, is going to live up to expectations of blinkeredness.
He made a nice little victory speech, but we know by now how hollow a victory speech can be; spoken in the emotive moments after the announced result, or even on the podium at the swearing-in ceremony. A look at the ceremonial speeches made by our prime ministers, from Alexander Bustamante to Andrew Holness, all share the same theme — we are going to unite this nation, under my watch we will drive out corruption, we will bring crime under control, and a lofty appeal usually for values and attitudes “to make this nation right”.
Very rarely, and only in bits and pieces, does the performance record of a Government live up to the promises made during the swearing-in speech. And this applies not only to Jamaica. I suppose that’s why they call it a swearing-in. The trouble is that these speeches are usually self-centred as it is coming from a person who is the centre of attraction and who is being acclaimed as the one and only leader at the time.
It would be so refreshing to hear one of these potentates take themselves out of the limelight at those pivotal moments and direct their nation’s attention to a higher power than themselves. King Solomon, Jewish king, was probably one of the most powerful kings of his time, yet when he spoke to, or exhorted his people into action on any special occasion, he stood up before them — and in modern times the CNN cameras would have been trained on him — and he would first of all acknowledge before his massive audience that “there is no God like You in heaven above or on Earth below”. He even went further, as he led his people in prayer, to ask: “But can you, O God, really live on Earth? Not even all heaven is large enough to hold you, so how can this temple (just built and being dedicated) be large enough?”
In what amounted to his swearing-in ceremony, Solomon stood up before his nation and asked as his first priority, “that the Lord, our God, be with us; may he never leave us, or abandon us. May he remember at all times this prayer and this petition I have made to Him. May he always be merciful to his people according to their daily needs”. And finally, in wrapping up, “May you, His people, always be faithful to the Lord, our God, obeying all his laws and commands, as you do today.” A very different kind of speech than the egotistical ones we are accustomed to from our leaders..
There was another great leader in the Bible who, before he received his official papers, took time out to listen to his God, who instructed him to “Get ready to lead, as I will be with you, I will always be with you, I will never abandon you.
“Be determined and confident,” God charged Joshua, “for you will be the leader of these people…just be determined, be confident, and make sure that you obey the whole law that my servant, Moses, gave you. Do not neglect any part of it and it and you will succeed wherever you go. Don’t be afraid or discouraged, for I the Lord am with you.” And as the Bible later records, “Not a word failed of any good thing which the Lord had spoken” (to Joshua).
RISKY BUSINESS OF BAUXITE
The bauxite industry, which has been floundering in recent times, is now being regenerated as investors do what they do best — take calculated risks and pour their resources and confidence into ventures that show promise. Consider this: Alpart, closed since 2009, is now preparing to put the ghosts of recent Christmases past to rest as new investors step up this week to announce more detailed plans for the reopening.
On the north coast, a bauxite company battered by bankruptcy and a place on the auction blocks, has come back to life renewed by the energy and creativity of new player DADA Holdings and New Day Aluminum.
In an employee ‘town hall meeting’ on November 9, 2016, employees were briefed by company owner and CEO David D’Addario on the sale and transfer of Noranda to New Day Jamaica Limited. DADA now takes on the 49 per cent and management aspect of the new partnership as the Government retains its 51 per cent.
The ‘town hall’ was followed by Government presentations, led by Mining Minister Mike Henry and Finance Minister Audley Shaw, confirming the partnership agreement and pointing the way forward for the 50-year-old operations that almost closed its doors this year. This new venture has been a huge relief, particularly to the communities of St Ann, who would have found it difficult to part company with their corporate neighbour.
I am always fascinated by the stories and anecdotes that bauxite veterans exchange when they meet at functions like the one described above. The industry itself goes back to 1953 and therefore holds a rich treasury of stories outside of the company fence that should one day be published in a book.
A favourite is one that again drew laughs last week. It is referred to as ‘The case of the headless pickup’: Picture, if you will, a superintendent driving out of the plant and heading downhill in the middle of a bright, sunny afternoon towards the main road below the plant. Halfway down the road he sees one of his department pickups coming towards him in an exaggerated slow motion uphill. As the two vehicles meet, he glances across to identify the driver. To his shock and amazement, there is no driver. “Do my eyes deceive me?” he would have asked himself as he peered into his rear-view mirror. The pickup continues at an even slower motion up the hill; with no sign of even a head or shoulder. He rubs his eyes, utters a couple Hail Marys, and decides that his best bet is to continue into town, have a couple stiff ones to recover, and return to the plant to sort out this mystery.
To his relief — and also for an entry into his discipline book — he found out that two employees had been driving the pickup against company policy, and when they saw their superintendent both of them ducked under the dashboard and somehow managed to navigate the vehicle back into the plant. The amazing thing, as the story goes, is that one employee was well over six feet, the other not more than five. So, there it was, the long and the short of it, and the case of the headless vehicle reaching the annals of the bauxite industry.
So I get it, so I tell it. More to come.
Lance Neita is a public and community relations consultant. Send comments to the Observer or lanceneita@hotmail.com.