Funny things that happen as you age
‘Father Time’ is a very tricky individual with a peculiar sense of humour and he plays games with us as we age.
These games may seem funny to onlookers, but are often far from humorous for the persons experiencing them.
He gives you a tonne of wisdom and practical sense when you age, but takes away the strength, muscles and vigour, so you can’t do much with it except talk and share.
We all would love to age gracefully and with as much dignity as possible, yet sometimes crazy things happen that we just have to shake our heads and take in strides. After all, it makes no sense getting worked up about sometimes that is as certain as taxes but hopefully less painful.
1. People start referring to you as ‘Pops’, ‘Elder’ or ‘Mummy’. None of these people know you or are related to by the way.
2. When you get down on the floor, for whatever reason, it takes you twice as long to get back up.
3. You avoid shoe laces and favour velcro.
4. If you forget someone’s name, you just call them ‘Dear’, ‘Sweety’ or ‘Love’ and they see it as a sign of endearment.
5. You do not have to join the long line that everyone stays in and complains. You have your own shorter queue, and most of the time you even have seating while you wait.
6. You have a rich collection of funeral programmes of all the friends and colleagues that you once knew who have transitioned.
7. You buy Christmas and birthday presents for loved ones and hide them so well that you cannot find them when the big occasion comes… so you buy them more.
8. You tell people your list of medical ailments and they do not write you off as a hypochondriac.
9. Everything that should be working on your body hurts, and whatever has stopped hurting has also stopped working.
10. You can sneeze, cough, fart and pee at the same time!