Used, abused and tossed aside

MEN often get a bad rap for their treatment of women — they’re the deadbeats, the degenerates, the users who chew their prey up and then spit them out, leaving many broken women in their wake. But women, too, shouldn’t escape the labels. In fact, some men confess, women are even more diabolical and scheming than are men sometimes because, they say, while a man will let you know in no uncertain terms that he’s prepping to pack up and move on, a woman will plan and scheme and, without warning, hit the road, leaving your heart in tatters alongside the garbage at the side of the road.

What’s your story of being used by a woman?

Dixon, 32:

Money was all she cared about, and for a while I was able to buy her what she wanted and have her live lavishly as a stay-at-home mom. She loved that, and I was okay with it because I was making bank. She and the kids were okay, she could shop online, I bought her cars and clothes… then COVID hit my business and our livelihood. It was the biggest and fastest metamorphosis I had ever witnessed. When I was on my face she was online looking for other men to date. One time she said she never meant “till death do us part”, she meant “till debt”.

Martin, 40:

She was using me for rent and food, and I thought I was just taking care of my girl like a man should, until one day we were fooling around and I called her phone while I was beside her and saw that my name was literally saved as “Rent Bae”. When I asked her what that was about she didn’t even try to deny it or come up with a story, she just said that “love is a barter” and asked me what I expected. Oh, she also revealed that there were other guys who did other things for her, and suggested that I was naive to think that a woman like her who wasn’t working could have her kind of lifestyle on just the money I contributed towards rent.

Deuce, 33:

I felt like I was being used for my body, and not much more. My last serious girlfriend was very specific about what she wanted — I had to be available when she called, and she didn’t want conversation, just action. I feel like many of these career women are like that, and I try to avoid them. I felt like a piece of meat, and it’s not a good feeling. Sometimes I’d have liked to talk about politics or other things too, and she would just laugh and tell me to come to bed. I wasn’t looking for anything casual at that time, so that treatment was disappointing.

Ricardo, 48:

My ex told me she was pregnant, and my mother always told me that once my name call, I had to step up. So, I stepped up and did the whole doctor appointments, buying clothes and baby supplies thing. Then she told me she wanted to have the baby at a certain private hospital, and I told her I could only afford UWI. She was annoyed, but she didn’t say anything afterwards. Next ultrasound visit she had a crowd there — her mom, sister, her older child, another guy, and me. I thought the guy was a family member until afterwards she told me that he was the other potential dad and he would pay for her to have the baby where she wanted. I couldn’t even speak. Long story short, he paid for the hospital and I suspect other things too, and though the DNA test afterwards proved I was the dad, I still felt extremely used.