LAST week, men, scalded by the women who tricked them, shared stories of the lies the fairer sex told that convinced them that women are the worst of the species.
But women will tell you that there are no lies greater than those told by men, especially Jamaican men who have so perfected the skill that it is second nature for many.
What's the wickedest lie a Jamaican man has every trapped you with? The women below say they are still recovering.
My ex told me that he was blessed, not only with good looks, wit, and vitality, but God had lingered on him when it came to carving him out into the perfect male specimen. This dude could charm the sting from a wasp, so, of course, I believed him. He was such a gentleman at first and didn't pressure me for sex or anything, and it was like six months after we started going out that we finally got intimate. You should have seen my face after act 1, scene 1. Puzzled, bewildered, confused were all the emotions that went through me. I even wondered what average was because things were just not adding up. Let's just say that either he was delusional or crazy because he was barely past minuscule, much less to be talking about being blessed. The only thing God lingered on was his ego, because it certainly wasn't on that thing below his waist.
He told me he had one daughter, but I found out that it actually wasn't one, or even two, or even three, but he was hiding a grand total of five little girls, and didn't think I'd realise that all the little girls he'd have at his place on occasion looked different. They were all similar ages and sizes, for the most part, but it was quite obvious that the girls weren't the same child, even though he tried to tell me that there was just one kid. His mother was the one who told me about the different kids and babymothers because this man would have made me lose my mind speculating.
My husband said his ex had been keeping his kids from him, even though he sent her money, and said she was a crazy stalker who couldn't bear to see him happy. I believed him for a long while and joined with him in cursing out the lady to his family. But, as the years went on, I started putting two and two together and realised some things didn't make sense. I then did what I should have done from the onset and contacted the mother, who gave me a very different story. She was a very nice, polished woman who was nothing like what he said. Homeboy was just posing like a caring dad when he was actually a deadbeat who also had another kid that he didn't even tell me about. I gave him a good tongue-lashing and ensured that he started paying for his kids, and nowadays they come for holidays, and their mother and I get along quite well.
He told me his father had died and borrowed money to go towards the nine night. I didn't get a chance to meet his dad or anything, and I was working overseas at the time so I wasn't any wiser to the scam. He even went out funeral shopping and posted RIP messages on his status, and on 'funeral day' got dressed and went to the funeral and sent me photos. Months after that I added one of his sisters on Facebook and saw her posting very recent photos with their father. He tried to explain it to say that he had been referring to his godfather, and I had got it wrong. That's when I realised that this man was a wicked, scamming, old thief, and I just blocked and deleted him.