Non-spanking disciplinary methods that work
SPANKING has been used by parents across cultures and social groups to keep children in line. But increasingly parents are exploring other methods to encourage changed behaviour in children in light of local and international laws and policies which prohibit the use of spanking, which has now been characterised as child abuse. While some parents have struggled to find a suitable replacement for spanking, many continue to test the waters.
This week some share with All Woman corrective disciplinary methods outside of spanking that they have found to be very effective.
Verona:
I did what my parents did to me. I was not corrected with spanking. I have a reward and demerit system. I was treated to things I like when I followed what my parents had socialised me to know were acceptable standards, and the opposite was done when I fell out of line. I didn’t like it, but it has helped to build the woman I am today. I have practised this with my two children and I have even set out to share some of their favourite toys with children who are less fortunate but are doing well academically and socially. Demerits for them also include taking away certain privileges such as the TV, browsing and game time, or even shopping.
Kemeisha:
I simply ignore him. Even in public if he pulls a tantrum I just let him be because the moment you give him attention is the moment that he believes that he has won. I have become so good at ignoring him when he misbehaves that I have to remind myself that it is OK to interact with him when he is out of his zone. Now he nags a little, but as it relates to tantrums and bad behaviour, he rarely ever throws a fit anymore.
Kenroy:
The naughty corner is probably one of the most effective non-spanking disciplinary measures that I have used. She knows that when she does something that is unacceptable, no amount of puppy-dog eyes could save her from the words, “Emma, naughty corner please.” Know that no matter how small your child is, you can talk to them and they will understand. The naughty corner, I believe, is a constant reminder of things that one should be ashamed about and refrain from doing in the future. The time spent in the corner for me depends on the act, and post-naughty corner usually includes apologies and an explanation of why she was sent to the corner.
Tego:
There are a few things we do. There is a points system which I know many parents use and nobody wants to lose points, especially if it means that they risk losing out on a great vacation or a really cool toy. We encourage our children to complete actions to make up for errors. The policy is pretty much open-door. They are well-behaved children that we haven’t had to lift a finger to correct.
Joy:
I take away things that they would like, for example TV time or time that they would play video games or browse their tablets. Also, I don’t give allowance and sometimes even give them additional chores, and absolutely no child wants that.
