Dating expectations
THE ‘$3 cheese’ lady enraged viewers on Tik Tok recently – the story was told by an American woman who said she had ghosted her date, after he refused to pay $3 extra for cheese on his burger during their first date. She said she paid the bill and walked out on her cheapskate date, blocking him after. But her actions were widely criticised, sparking debate about dating expectations, and what are red flags to look out for.
Back home, ‘dating’ is not a broad part of the culture — some people laughingly say that Jamaicans don’t date, they will see someone they like, and the next minute they’re moving in, totally bypassing the dating stage. But what are your dating expectations, and what are the wildest experiences you’ve had navigating the Jamaican dating scene?
Edward, 37:
I invited this temporary worker out for dinner, as we both had eyes for each other at work. I’m a gentleman, so I expect to treat a woman right, and then see where things go. We were to meet at the restaurant, and I arrived early and sat waiting for her. When she called to say she had reached, I got up to greet her, and not just one friend, but two. I can understand her wanting to play it safe with me, but she expected me to cover the bill for three additional people, and hadn’t warned me before. And these women were not stingy with their meals. I did end up paying, because as I said I’m a gentleman, but it was such a turn-off. After that I just walked far from her for the remainder of the time she worked at the office.
Toya, 25:
I’m not choosy at all, and once I like you, it doesn’t matter where we go on our date. So this man invites me out, and suggests that we go uptown to eat. I suggested a few other restaurants, but he was adamant that he wanted to try out this new place that he saw on Insta. Anyway, I went and ordered, and stuck with chicken because I was being conscientious. He wanted wine and even dessert, and afterwards, tried to use the “I left my wallet at home” trick. I told him I left my purse too, and we both sat looking at each other, until he “remembered” that he had a card in his car. He had the nerve afterwards to ask me if I wanted to come to his apartment to watch TV, and got annoyed when I said no thanks.
Tamiann, 30:
The term stay in your lane was invented for this man who took me from my nice, comfortable house, and drove all the way up the hill to a posh restaurant and activity centre, then ordered food while we did activities and made all kinds of posts on Instagram. Then when he saw the bill, he started panicking. The man almost had an asthma attack, and even took out his calculator to do the math himself. Then he asked me if I was a 50-50 girl, and I just cut my eye at him and paid the entire bill. It was just the principle of the thing for me — why go somewhere to flex, when you know it’s outside your budget?
Kenrick, 40:
I don’t judge people, because everybody’s circumstances are different. So when I took this lady out and she asked for her leftovers to go in a box, I didn’t care, even though she literally had nothing left worthy of saving. Then she also asked for the bread we didn’t finish eating, then asked me if I minded if she ordered something to go, as the “rabbit food” she had eaten would “breeze out” by the time she got home to Portmore. I just called it a loss and didn’t invite her out for a second date, because her belly obviously long like the Mississippi.
