No one really cares if you are in it just for the fun; it’s the money that matters.

After last week’s show I decided to take a trip with a few friends to the Florida Keys to release the tension, now I am back from my jet setting weekend to Digicel Deal or No Deal, and these contestants are at best a waste of airtime. Why is there $3 million on the line and still no takers. If you have not noticed I have decided to increase the top 3 prizes to $1 Million, $2 Million and $3 million.

Over the past few weeks I have paid close attention to the selection of contestants, their strategies, or more so their lack thereof, and I have decided to do a little rundown for you of the do’s and don’ts of Digicel Deal or no Deal.

Do acknowledge and always remember that I am the one true winner of the game and you need to play the game for second place.

Do pay close attention to the values remaining on the money tree as my offers do not float out of thin air; they are heavily influenced by the values.

Do watch the follies and failures of previous contestants and DO NOT make the same stupid mistakes or you will end up going home with no money and even less pride.

Do listen to the suggestions and opinions of your supporters or cheerleaders, whatever you wish to call them; they often have proved in previous shows to have more leveled heads than the players themselves.

Please pay careful attention to the don’ts because in all cases I determine the outcome of the game.

DO NOT upset, annoy or irritate me. I absolutely despise arrogant and loud contestants who think they can defeat me. Never play with fire.

DO NOT foolishly decline my generous offers, especially when you have very little options. No one wants to waste their time to see the loose change you have in your case. So please spare us.

DO NOT come to play without a game plan. Set a target that you are willing to settle for. No one really cares if you are in it just for the fun; it’s the money that matters.

DO NOT set your expectations too high. I will only allow you to leave with what I think is a reasonable payout. The nicer you are the more likely I am to allow you to leave with a decent payout.

DO NOT waste my time. I am always prepared for a fight, so come with the energy, enthusiasm and a logical plan to play the game. I hate to miss golf on account of some overambitious skill-less player.

Last week’s contestant Ms Wilson made a fair attempt, unfortunately she was not able to benefit from my genius advice, too bad. Let us that hope tonight’s player Sabrina Serrant enjoys her 15 minutes of fame and maybe some Christmas money.