I am 67 years old and work part-time. My 60-year-old brother works full-time, makes US$27,000 a year and lives with my husband and me. My 70-year-old husband is retired. When we agreed that my brother could live with us, he was to contribute his share to the household income, which he did until recently. He met a woman nearly 20 years younger than he is, which was the beginning of his financial demise. He still works full-time but has stopped contributing to living expenses and spends his money on her. Now my husband and I are paying his share of everything. How can I tell my brother to leave?

LOOK at the facts. You are not refusing to help a hard-working brother who suddenly lost his job and can’t afford his lifestyle anymore; you are refusing to be used by a fully employed brother who would rather give his money to a younger woman (who, at 40, should also be fully employed).

If anyone should feel shame and guilt over the situation, it is your brother.

To work up the courage to speak to him, think about how he intentionally stopped paying you, so in a sense, you, too, are supporting his girlfriend. If that doesn’t make you angry, nothing will. Also, this woman may be a master manipulator, to the point where he doesn’t realise how wrong he is until you explain it to him.

If you or your husband can’t ask him to leave, then demand that he pay his share of household expenses as long as he lives there. When you and your husband get tired of supporting your brother while his new girlfriend reaps the financial benefits, giving him an ultimatum of “contribute or move out” will be easy.

— Creators News Service