If thou think I am too quickly won,

I’ll frown and be perverse

And say thee nay,

So thou wilt woo.

— Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet II, 2

WOO, of course, means to court, to see a woman, take an interest, date her and do all the niceness to win her. But most women don’t like to appear to be too easy, too easily won, as the lady said in the above quote, so they’ll play hard to get, frown and be perverse, and say thee nay, just to let the man chase after her

and woo.

Now, I’m not too sure if most women still feel that way, as so many nowadays are so eager to land a man that no wooing is necessary, as it’s open season all year long. That ‘come hither’ or ‘come and get it’ look is almost standard among some women in these modern times.

Of course, that applies to a certain type of woman, the ones who are easy, no challenge, dime a dozen, just flash your car keys or buy them a box lunch and it’s bed time for you both. When it comes to women of quality though, that’s when a man has to utilise various skills to attract and hold them. Those women are not desperate and will not give in to the first man who calls to them. “Oh come on now, you’ll have to do much better than that if you want to get next to this lady.” That’s if she even bothers to answer him at all.

But how does a man attract a woman of substance? What can he do and what should he say if he wants a classy lady in his life? We’ll find out right after we see what these readers had to say about Phallus.

Hi Tony,

Men who say that size doesn’t matter either have shortcomings or blame the tool and don’t know how to use it effectively. You mentioned that even lesbians are fascinated with the phallus, but some just resort to instruments that are phallic. Adolescent males are also quite phallic to the point of taking matters into their own hands. As for your footnote regarding ignorance…. ignorance is NOT bliss.

Samuel

Teerob,

“Ergo phallus,” “Don’t be a ….phallus,” “Men always use groin guards,” “Lesbians backslide,” OMG Teerob, you crack me up. I got the subtle innuendo… you think that I’m flaccid? I’m a married woman, so such references penetrate my understanding. LOL.

KBL

Mr Robinson,

Scientists have written for years about the phallus, penis obsession and even penis envy in women, citing that all women wish they had one. The truth is, many women hold men by theirs, and lead them around by it.

Jennifer

We live in an age where women are always harping that it’s so difficult to find a good man and horse dead and cow fat. But strangely, not much is said about the fact that men also are in the market to seek a good partner, not just a good-time girl, a one-night stand, a quickie, but a lady of quality. Well, some men seek those too, but whatever type of woman a man seeks, he has to have some method of attracting her.

If I had titled this article, ‘Picking up Great Chicks’ I would perhaps have incurred the wrath of some fiery militant feminists. But then again, I always incur the wrath of militant feminists. The truth is, picking up chicks is the mandate of men, but there is an art to attracting women, and sadly, not many men have mastered it. Some are born with it, others acquire it, while most have to learn it.

And don’t believe for one minute that it has anything to do with looks either, for many so-called good-looking men still can’t get quality women, while there are men who you’d deem homely, unattractive, even ugly, who always seem to get the good ladies.

For many it doesn’t come easy, for very young boys aren’t usually attracted to, or seem attractive to young girls. That’s ingrained from an early age. As they grow older to the teenage years, the hormones kick in, and the confusion starts. Enter the clumsy years, the era of nerves, awkwardness and faux pas, always saying and doing the wrong thing.

Some young men have the gift of gab, and can talk almost any woman out of her clothes. But those are few and far between. Those guys seem to be able to get any woman they have in their sights, including their friends’ women and even their friends’ wives. They are the stuff legends are made of. Most are idolised by other men. “Dem man can attract any woman dem want, a dem man me want to be like.” Secretly, they are adored by women.

But the average guy has to learn the art, the skills to attract a quality woman. It’s somewhat like fishing, where you throw out the baited line and feel for a nibble. When she bites you reel her in gently, just pulling a bit, then easing off when there is resistance.

The bait can be flowers, which women still love, based on the numerous flower shops around. Not too many, mind you, but just enough to get her attention, especially when there is no special occasion like Valentine’s Day and such.

Then there is the written word, and even though we live in an era where letters and poems aren’t so much in vogue anymore, a well-written note or a deep poem will usually get a quality woman’s attention.

Remember, I said quality woman, for those efforts are wasted on sketels and easy lays. “Is what dis fooleenish him writing and saying to me….. after poetry can’t buy box lunch.” The trick, though, is not to lay it on too thick or come on too strong. You can’t just meet her and start to shower her with jewellery, flowers and gifts. “Oi, take time, nuh, slow down, boss, mind she choke.” Usually this can’t be maintained anyway, and fades after a while.

Now with Facebook, Twitter and even regular e-mails, a man can correspond with the lady of his desire and show his heart to her. Just last week I saw where there is this new dating site in the USA designed to pick up women. The guys who used it boasted of increasing their pool of belles by 300 per cent. I

can’t vouch for the quality of the women.

The old-time face-to-face approach always works, but there are do’s and dont’s. When you’re with the woman, make sure that it’s not all about you, but about her. Too many men fall into the pool of narcissism and end up having to love themselves when night falls. “I did this, and I did that, and it was I who advised the PM, and I mentored those athletes, and I gave the governor of the Bank of Jamaica economic advice.” No woman wants to hear that. And yet, so many men keep on doing this. Be confident, but not boastful. Ask about her, what she likes, her interests, her plans…. let her talk.

Also, don’t talk about your past love interests, good or bad. Many men feel that by putting down their past girlfriends it scores points with the new love interest. It doesn’t, and only shows him up for the creep that he really is. Plus, never ever kiss and tell, boasting of past conquests.

Women look for different things in men and usually a quality woman can know if she’s attracted to a man from the first encounter. So many men strike out often, and still don’t know why they do, ending up empty-handed. One more failure.

“I don’t understand it, every woman I meet never calls me back,” this guy told me recently. No wonder so many men resort to these dating sites, and yet many still strike out.

Money does not work on quality women, although it may attract the shallow ones. That is a false attraction that usually has no long-term positive results. Attracting quality women is an art, a skill, a gift, which sadly seems to be in decline. The reason is, a lot of men don’t think that they have to attract women anymore, as the females seem to be rushing the men nowadays.

The quality women don’t do that though, and that’s why they’re often left on the shelf. The irony is, there are still men who can’t get women. Go figure.

More time.

seido1@hotmail.com

Footnote: Our athletes bring us so much success, and they certainly pay the price for it. The more success they bring, is the more many Jamaicans demand of them. And they dare not fail. We expect gold every single time, and failing to win is not acceptable. Even when we win silver and bronze in swimming, our people curse and say that it’s not good enough, saying it should have been gold.

Do people realise how difficult competitive swimming is? Alia Atkinson won silver and bronze, unprecedented in our swimming history, and some people still aren’t satisfied. How dare they. Our athletes do their personal best and come second or third, and

are vilified.

Do those critics know what personal best means? Why are people so ignorant and ungrateful? But, like I said, our athletes are victims of their own success. It has spoiled so many people, especially the dull and ignorant.