The cunnilingus conundrum
The recent kerfuffle surrounding the release of a videotape showing a policeman in uniform ‘servicing’ a female companion has brought into sharp focus the controversial subject of oral sex in a society that is rife with hypocrisy when it comes to matters of a sexual nature. From an ethical and moral standpoint, it may well be acceptable to chastise the officer for what he was videotaped doing in flagrante delicto, seeing that he is allegedly married and is a deacon, not to mention that he was easily identified in his Jamaica Constabulary Force (JCF) garb! In this vein, Police Commissioner Antony Anderson was well within the scope of his authority when he ordered that the cop in question be interdicted. As to what his ultimate punishment will be remains to be seen, bearing in mind that the JCF has had a not too impressive history of putting police officers on interdiction for a very long time, if not indefinitely.
Meanwhile, public debate on this incident has taken many forms; from those congratulating the cop on his “linguistic” skills to those condemning him for his perceived lewd and lascivious behaviour. Then there are those individuals, in particular some women, who have been salivating at the thought of how skilful he was at taking his female companion to such heights of ecstasy, so much so that one female pastor living overseas was quoted as saying she would be more than willing to marry him if his wife should decide to throw him out of the matrimonial home.
In the meantime, perhaps a survey should be done to determine the extent to which the sale of rum and raisin ice cream may or may not have been affected in the wake of this well publicised incident. This, as the woman being pleasured, having instructed the dutiful cop to lick his fingers which were in active use, asked him how they tasted. His response was, “rum and raisin”. Already, the story is told about a husband who, after having had his dinner, asked his wife what was for dessert. She replied with a devilish, enticing look in her eyes, “Rum and raisin ice cream!”
Seriously though, there has always been the perception that the issue of oral sex is taboo in the Jamaican society. For the most part, many Jamaicans have dismissed it as an “uptown affectation”, while those in the lower socio-economic bracket condemn it as nasty and ungodly. The latter view is oftentimes expressed in the dancehall lyrics spewed by many artistes who sometimes accuse their rivals of being “bow cats” or “eating under table”. However, from an anecdotal standpoint, as well as research data, it has been revealed that, with the advent of cable television and the easy access to porn videos via the Internet, many Jamaicans from all walks of life, including the youth, have been indulging in this once-tabooed activity. Evidence of various leaked videotapes substantiate this.
Needless to say, that numerous Jamaican women when interviewed privately have revealed that they are more than enamoured with this practice. This may well have come against the backdrop of a survey which was done some years ago by a reputable Caribbean organisation that revealed a large percentage of women expressing the view that they received very little satisfaction from their male partners who were only selfishly satisfying themselves. In this regard, it has been said by sexual experts that the secret in pleasuring a woman in the most fulfilling way is by way of foreplay, which invariably may involve oral stimulation of the female genitals.
On the other hand, many lower- and middle-class Jamaican young men see giving a woman the ultimate pleasure in bed as akin to carrying out an act of violence. Hence, such expressions as “kill summ’n” and “stab up di meat”. Indeed, if the woman does not scream and bawl, they do not feel that she is being properly satisfied. Interestingly, too, there are some women who love this rough stuff, and are therefore prone to give their men the “wickedest slam”, akin to the Beenie Man song.
However, outside of religious beliefs, personal taste, and hygienic concerns, it is the considered opinion by most medical practitioners that oral sex is not “nasty” and can play a pivotal role in providing the ultimate pleasure in human copulation. In fact, they posit that as long as certain prescribed safe sex protocols are observed then “nutten no wrong wid it!”
It must be noted, too, that with the advent of social media, what was done behind closed doors and away from the public scrutiny is now so frequently splashed in cyberspace, many times with malice aforethought, rife with vindictiveness as well as the intent to blackmail. In this context, the goodly policeman who was so exposed should perhaps gain our sympathy, rather than our disdain. And what of the person who leaked it?
In the final analysis, like so many other nine-day wonders, this case of the finger licking cop will in time recede into the background. As for this writer, I find this cunnilingus conundrum to be quite a tongue-twister. No pun intended.
Lloyd B Smith has been involved full-time in Jamaican media for the past 44 years. He has also served as a Member of Parliament and Deputy Speaker of the House of Representatives. He hails from western Jamaica, where he is popularly known as the Governor. Send comments to the Jamaica Observer or lbsmith4@gmail.com.