Retirement and identity crisis: How to leave your former job behind
RETIREMENT should not be seen as a destination but a new journey — another important phase of life to explore and enjoy.
But why are some retirees finding it hard to make this major transition? The answers vary. Retirement transition can be sudden for some, and for others retirement means the end of a productive way of life and the loss of a community of colleagues or friends that shared a working environment in common.
The question many asked at retirement is “Who am I”? They are no longer the person on their resume and it becomes confusing and stressful in identifying their new roles in retirement. Throughout their working years, their identity was closely intertwined with their jobs or careers. Their self-worth was linked to their jobs. Saying goodbye to that phase of one’s life can be quite stressful even for those who planned for retirement.
There are true stories of former employees returning to their former places of employment unannounced as if they never left. There was no new engagement with the organisation, but the employees just find it hard to pull themselves from the environment that was second home to them. Having spent more time at work than with family for many years, the psychological toll becomes great when separation becomes a reality. Retirement can create a loss of identity for those who had little or no social life during their working years or those whose social life was wrapped around their career. A permanent separation from a lifelong career to retirement can cause a painful transition. For those who are forced to retire because of ill health, premature retirement can be a rather traumatic experience, especially if retirement savings are inadequate.
Dealing with a sudden job loss at an advanced age can usher the unemployed into retirement earlier than anticipated. There is the story of former US Army pilot Robert Fulton who, after flying for 50 years, lost his job unexpectedly. Being a pilot was all he knew. He was devastated when retirement came months before he was vested in the company’s pension plan. Fulton was so devastated and depressed he did nothing for several months. At age 66 he never believed he could reinvent his career and benefit from new opportunities and connections. Accepting the recommendation of a retirement coach, Fulton journalled his life experiences. He subsequently wrote books and screenplays, started a podcast, and became an award-winning speaker. Fulton said he has never been happier in his life.
It is a fact that some people define who they are by their jobs, careers, or the activities that they are involved in, and upon retiring or separation there is an overwhelming sense of losing their identity. Your identity is who you are as a person. It concerns your characteristics, personality, purpose, and life’s mission, and may include your relationships, goals, and achievements. A clear distinction should be made between your personal identity and your job/career, status, possessions, and academic achievements.
Think about your retirement years before you get there. What is it that you enjoy doing? In retirement, you may have more time to develop those interests that you were too busy to enjoy because of your job. There are persons who look forward to retirement because they are prepared for it. Just as a financial plan is important for your retirement, so too a diversified plan of action should be in place covering social activities or new engagements, healthy lifestyle, hobbies, career change or business opportunities. That’s your psychological wellness portfolio. Think about the people you want to spend time with in retirement and places you want to visit. Stave off loneliness by communicating regularly with family and friends. What about being a mentor to young people, whether they are located at your former place of employment, church, clubs, online, or a particular location or facility? Pre-retirees can make use of social media, learn new technology, and how to use communication tools. There are social and emotional benefits for retirees who have active lives in retirement. Employers can assist with preparing employees to face the challenges of retirement by conducting seminars and workshops up to five and 10 years prior to retirement.
Mary Wallace and Julie Tenbusch are retired nurses who founded a baking business in Michigan, United States, in 2014. Ten per cent of the profit goes to a charity in Detroit. Before retiring from her nursing job, Wallace knew that there was more for her to do with her life, and she underscored the importance of retirees being emotionally and physically engaged.
I have shared in this column previously of individuals locally who are retired and have gone on to do meaningful activities and participate in gainful ventures. When you are in retirement and you are no longer a plumber, a doctor, a lawyer, a teacher, a company executive, etc, the identity question asked is “Who are you”? In a particular case, a retired doctor whose medical practice was closed said that he won’t get accustomed to being called “mister”. That’s a challenge faced by retirees whose identities have been their career titles. Retirees experiencing any signs of depression should seek medical advice early. Beat identity crisis in retirement by continuing to do what you love — working part-time, seeking new ventures and hobbies. Learn the benefits of volunteerism. Research shows that retirees who are volunteers enjoy happy and healthy lives.
— Grace G McLean is a financial advisor & retirement specialist at BPM Financial Limited. Contact her at gmclean@bpmfinancial, and visit the website: www.bpmfinancial.com. She is also a podcaster for Living Above Self. E-mail her at livingaboveself@gmail.com