This momentary joy,

Breeds months of pain,

This hot desire,

Converts to cold disdain.

— Shakesepeare, Lucrece

Hot blood, hot thunder,

And hot deeds.

— Shakespeare, Troilus and Cressida

Well, well, well, as you may have gleaned from those two quotes above, today’s topic may just border on the ribald side, a tad risqué, not for the prudes or the religious righteous, not for the pseudo pious, and certainly not for the hypocrites. But it more than smacks of truth, and we all know that the truth shall set you free.

Now, I’m sure by now many of you are aware, or should be, of the term ‘Freak Off’, that was bandied about during the trial of music mogul P Diddy in the USA. These Freak Offs were supposed to be orgies of lust, rampant sexuality with multiple partners that went on for days and were basically fun filled frolics of fornication, fuelled by lust, desire and raging sexuality.

But guess what, these activities aren’t new, nothing is new under the Sun, for as the French say, the more things change, the more they remain the same. This applies to sin too, and many people consider these Freak Offs to be sinful acts, but there is much pleasure in sin, or people would not indulge.

“Revel the night, rob, murder and commit the oldest sins, the newest kinds of ways.” — Shakespeare.

But who determines that these orgies or Freak Offs are sins anyway? They may be morally questionable, but they sure bring a lot of people a lot of pleasure.

We’ll check out the Freak Offs, right after these comments about my take on ‘Complicit’.

Hello Tony,

You have me laughing again. If you were to ask me, your subject matter has become fashionable. Some persons prefer to risk it all, even in marriage. It’s passion on the loose. Those involved in those acts have shredded morality into pieces and want you to keep quiet or mind your own business. What a trendy pastime for some.

Paulette

Teerob,

Brother, you really touched a nerve with this one, for I was complicit when I allowed my best friend to take his lover to my apartment for their rendezvous. In my mind I was just doing him a favour, but I was as guilty as he was in his cheating ways. I was a part of the problem, I was complicit.

Roger

Now on to the matter at hand, the Freak Offs or modern-day orgies that were brought to the public eye during the P Diddy trial. Like I said, they aren’t new, just given a new name that’s all, for in ancient Rome they had frequent orgies that lasted for days.

Roman historians have described sumptuous feasts, pairing sex and food. In the decade 89-90 BC, the tyrant Sylla was the first Roman political leader to convene erotic drinking parties. He would have taken the concept from the Greeks: eating, dancing, prostitutes and food were omnipresent.

So basically, all that the modern Freak Offs did were to mimic what had been going on for centuries. The only difference is that now in this modern day of hypocritical morality and pseudo piousness, it’s frowned upon.

But frowned upon by who?

“Home is heaven and orgies are vile, but you need an orgy once in a while,” said Ogden Nash.

“The natural rhythm of human life is routine punctuated by orgies.” — Aldous Huxley

So orgies are part of our lives, either in practice or in our fantasies, for if they weren’t, so many people would not be so fascinated with the testimonies given regarding the Freak Offs in that now infamous trial.

People just couldn’t get enough of the daring descriptions, and the more they heard is the more that they craved as they lapped up the salacious, steamy, sensual, syrupy, slithery, slippery scenes described in the courthouse. Yes, that’s what the numerous bottles of baby oil were for. Plus, when they saw how beautiful some of the women were, they salivated at the lips even more.

“OMG, if I could just be involved in one of those freak offs, even just one time, I’d be a happy man.”

Although some people condemned them, they secretly wished that in their dull drab lives they could have been a part of that swinging scene.

“Man, when I saw those beautiful women and heard what they were doing, I wished that it was me.”

Still, in this modern day it’s frowned upon, and lots of big name people are either on trial or serving time in the USA for indulging and orchestrating these high-profile Freak Offs. But that’s the price that some have to pay for indulging in wanton pleasure.

But it’s not for everybody, for people with no interest in sex, who have no desire or even one lustful bone in their body, would have no interest in those Freak Offs, so they need not apply, for they would fail to see what the hullabaloo is all about. But for people who are sex oriented or have sex on their mind, body, and soul that’s perhaps not being fulfilled, then these Freak Offs will be of great interest to them.

Most people will never get involved in a Freak Off, of course, but they can dream. And as the saying goes, “If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride.”

Women also fall into this category, although most would never admit to it. But based on the P Diddy trial, it was revealed that his girlfriend also initiated and arranged some of those Freak Offs and even chose the male escorts that she wanted to take part.

As the defence lawyer said, “That was no crime, your honour, she was a woman who just happened to love sex.”

Women who do not like sex or have no interest would never understand, and neither would men with the same affliction. But it’s really the men who are in the majority when it comes fantasising about Freak Offs.

And trust me, you’d be surprised who falls prey to liberal sexuality. Just recently in the news I saw where these Buddhist monks were seduced by a woman in Thailand and then blackmailed to keep the sexual activities secret.

“At least nine abbots and senior monks involved in the scandal have been disrobed and cast out of the monkhood,” the Royal Thai Police Central Investigation Bureau said. Now, if monks can fall prey to seduction, what chance do ordinary men have? I keep telling you, man is man and nothing is stronger than pleasures of the flesh, not even religion.

For those who can’t indulge in Freak Offs, the next best thing is to have their own personal Freak Offs, albeit on a smaller scale. They have affairs and carry out their fantasies with their lovers. I say lovers and not wives or husbands, because usually the most audacious sexual escapades are conducted by lovers on the side and not by husbands and wives. Affairs are basically about sex.

As one guy said, “No sah, I could never ask my wife to do all those kinky things, I respect her too much.” So he indulges his fantasies with his mistress on the side and has his own private Freak Off.

That’s why some men will go with prostitutes, high-priced ones too, or have one-night stands, for they are basically mini Freak Offs with no strings attached. I have had friends who indulged in prostitutes who told me, “I love my wife, but she would never do what the prostitute does, with no inhibitions.”

Maybe that’s why some wise old souls came up with the saying that marriage ruins sex. Maybe they were right, for it’s hardly likely that the sexual gymnastics and acrobatic marathons that were conducted while dating and even into the Honeymoon stage will be replicated after 20 years of marriage.

“Say what, hang from where, bend over what, put my leg where? You forgot my backache, plus I have work in the morning.”

So thoughts and dreams of the Freak Offs take centrestage and some men may orchestrate them with their own personal Freak Offs with the other woman. And yes, some women do it too, but many times their emotions complicate the situation. And there are consequences.

Just a few weeks ago in the USA, this big shot CEO of a major company was caught on a kiss-cam with his lover while attending a Coldplay rock concert. He was there with his mistress, and even though they tried to duck out of the damning gaze of the camera and spotlight, it was too late, they were both busted, and it cost him his job.

A kiss-cam is when the camera zooms in on a random couple in a crowd and spotlights them, making them smooch. So my question is, why take your clandestine lover to a public concert attended by thousands of people and massive video coverage? Duh.

The other ironic observation that was made, was that the man’s wife was far more beautiful than his lover. But I have been saying this for many years — many men take lovers on the side who are less beautiful than their wives, for beauty can only go so far. Men have left their uptown wives and taken up with waitresses or barmaids from the other side of the tracks, even marrying them.

There has to be a serious reason why a man would do that, so before you condemn or judge him, ask the question: Is it an indictment on him, or on the wife who he’d rather not be around? There are countless gorgeous women who are cheated on or have no man of their own: they get them, but can’t keep them.

So as long as there is lust, sensuality, sexual chemistry, raging libido, there will be Freak Offs. Some will be initiated, some we live vicariously, others just dreamed of, but there’s a little Freak Off in all of us.

More time.

seido1yard@gmail.com

Footnote: There is always much fanfare about the ‘big sports’, but there are other sporting disciplines that are also excelling, and martial arts are well represented. Karate has been doing very well, with current standard bearer young Rasandre Evans who has been blazing a trail across the circuits with his exploits. He won gold at the Central Caribbean Cup in Panama this March. At one point he was ranked as high as 10th in the world and is currently preparing for participating in next month’s PanAmerican Championships to be held in Paraguay. Much thanks to the Jamaica Olympic Association (JOA) which has been a staunch supporter of karate in Jamaica and without which the sport would not have achieved the current success that it is enjoying. Apart from tournaments, the JOA has been instrumental in supporting overseas seminars and workshops that are vital for the development of karate for our youngsters. We are truly grateful for this unwavering support.