Signs he’s undateable
WOMEN are usually very meticulous in their choice of men, and while some of them have detailed checklists, others are willing to ride the tide of a spiritual connection.
Counselling psychologist Ivret Williams says that while it may take a date or two for a woman to make a decision on whether a man is dateable or not, there are some qualities that will send women running and screaming in the opposite direction almost instantaneously.
These include:
He is negligent in his personal appearance
Unkempt facial hair, not being keen on hygiene or the condition of his clothes are deal breakers. Usually this means that he is just as messy in the house and he doesn’t care to improve it. Men like these usually don’t even get a first date.
He doesn’t want to get married
He tells you upfront that he doesn’t want to get married. When he says so, believe him and don’t try to change him. If you are a woman looking forward to a commitment, this could be a sign that he does not intend to remain committed to you. Throw that fish back out in the sea.
He asks to borrow money on the first date
If he uses the old ‘I forgot my wallet’ line, beware. Not only is this a sign of an ill-prepared man, but it shows that you’ll be his bank account if you take him on for the long haul. If you realise that you have stumbled on such a man, you may want to discontinue dating him.
He’s controlling
He wants to know your every move, and he makes sure to remind you how important it is that you check in.
He’s secretive
He hides his phone when replying to a text message, stops a conversation with you so that he can take all his calls privately, or refuses to talk about general things about himself and family. In all fairness, an amount of privacy is expected since you are just getting to know each other, but if he is too secretive you may not want to date him. He could very well be carrying more baggage than you can handle.
He doesn’t have a vision
Everybody has even a miniscule idea of where they want to be and the things that they hope to achieve. If he’s the exception — no plans, goals or vision, and he wants to live for the present, beware. He will be a waste of your time.
He talks down to or belittles women
Listen to how he talks to women whom he engages in conversation with while you are around. Is he pleasant and gentlemanly or is he rude, aggressive, or talks down to others? These are key to understanding the value that he puts on women. If he is degrading or rude, he will soon start treating you that way too.
He’s emotionally unstable
He purrs like a cat one minute then roars like a lion another. These are signs that he is emotionally unstable and you don’t know when he will go off on you.
He is negative
He sees only the negative in every situation, while you were taught to embrace the silver lining. Feeding off a negative person could see you becoming a person who fails to try or explore the benefits that could be derived from different opportunities that you may be presented with.
He has too much baggage
We all have baggage — some we pick up along the way and others that we inherit. Regardless of how he obtained them, you may want to consider the extent of his baggage before you agree to date or continue dating him.
