Kept men and the women who spend on them

FOR ages men have been socialised to be providers who are expected to take care of their women and their households. Even the good book, the Bible, speaks to a man’s responsibility to his home, and for the traditional woman, there’s nothing wrong with stepping in and carrying the home when her man who usually works and makes his contribution is out of a job.

However, gender roles have evolved, much to the delight of some men who enjoy being ‘kept’ by women. It also sits well for a new breed of independent women who are fine with taking care of their men.

Gone are the days when women were the ones who focused on sprucing up to attract wealthy men. Rather, men have turned the tables, and not without the support of some women who are spending their money to have them by their side. So why are we seeing so many ‘kept’ men these days and what type of women are spending their money to ‘keep’ them?

More men want to be kept

There is a growing number of men now who are simply looking for women in a good financial position who are willing to spend on them. Often they are younger and good looking but do not have a resume because they have never held a job and have no intention of changing that. In most cases they have mastered the art of scouting women of means, and similar to the mentality of some women in regards to a man spending on them, they believe a woman ought to maintain them.

More women are willing to spend on men

For various reasons it appears there are now more women who are willing to take care of men financially. Some of these women know upfront what is expected of them and are fine with it. These are usually independent women who know exactly what they want and are willing to buy it if necessary. They see these men as fulfilling a need they have, at a cost, which they are comfortable absorbing.

He’s a metrosexual who has developed the art of pleasing women

Some ‘kept’ men have the game of attracting women to support them down to a ‘T’. They know that women like men who put themselves together well, take care of their bodies, are affectionate, charming and attentive to their needs. Sometimes a woman will take a broke man as long as he gives her a lot of attention, affection, and treats her with respect. Armed with this knowledge, a ‘kept’ man masters the art of treating women well, for a price.

Some older, financially secure women want younger men

Similar to how an older man likes to have the young, beautiful wife or partner whom all his friends envy him for, some older, financially secure women are opting for the younger men they can flaunt in front of their female friends. If they have to pay to get him, they will. Often he serves the purpose of stroking her ego and keeping her sexually satisfied.

Vulnerable women are preys

A woman’s state of mind, and her emotional and mental health can make her a target for ‘kept’ men. She doesn’t have to be rich. As long as she works, earns her own money and is going through something that affects her ability to make good, solid relationship decisions, she is good prey for a man who knows all the right things to say in order to get her to take care of him. Emotional dependence and sometimes desperation for companionship might result in a woman who finds herself with a ‘kept’ man, being unwilling to end that situation.

She got caught by the charm

Sometimes a woman is swept off her feet by a charming man who she later learns is a seasoned ‘kept’ man who has mastered the art of seducing women. She might allow things to remain for various reasons including shame, as she perhaps already introduced him to everyone who matters in her life, only to discover he’s just into her for the money. She may also keep things as they are if he plays the toy boy role satisfactorily and showers her with affection.

Marie Berbick, aka The PR Girl, is a communications specialist, motivational speaker and founder of the women’s ministry Sisters United for Prayer, Healing, Empowerment & Restoration (SUPHER). Follow her on Twitter @thePR Girl or e-mail marieberbick@gmail.com.