He said I didn’t meet the ‘wife’ criteria

MANY of us would have, at some point in a past relationship, felt that things had hit rock bottom. It could be that expectations were not being met, someone else came in the picture, or the circumstances were too toxic. Either way, we would know deep down that it’s time to move on, even if we held on to the worn threads of the relationship, hoping the shoddy stitch wouldn’t unravel. For others, upon this realisation, they simply cut their losses and hit the road.

When is the actual moment of realisation? Below All Woman readers state the moment they knew it was time to move on from a relationship.

Alyssa E:

It was a young relationship in terms of how long we were talking, and our ages. Our expectations were different and what did it for me was when he got upset that I decided to go to school and further my education. For him, me being at home and starting a family were sufficient, and how dare I educate myself and aspire for something more in life? I just walked away. My independence was important to me.

Miguel F:

I had let the relationship die a natural death and then I knew it was really time to go. I wouldn’t say I wasted my time, but it was time to move on. It did its course.

Ricardo J:

I knew I was wasting my time when major decisions were made without me. She was migrating and I never knew until the day she landed in the States. Even then I tried to work it out and maintain a long-distance relationship. Then she started sending me photos of guys she began going out with as “friends”. Then and there I said to myself, what’s the point? She would always want what I couldn’t give and I couldn’t afford to visit twice per year. We had an amicable parting.

Elaine D:

When we started dating he said three years wouldn’t pass [without a commitment]. At year five I said maybe he isn’t ready. Year eight came and I asked what’s up. He told me that he was not sure that I met the criteria for what he wanted in a wife. I walked away and refused to try to be his ideal. I am who I am.

Annastacia T:

We kept arguing over the same issues. When I thought something was dealt with, he would bring it up again. When I thought compromises were being made, they really weren’t. He tried to place the blame squarely on me as well. I eventually met someone who showed me that men had the potential to be decent human beings and I left and stopped stressing myself out.

Shawn H:

She was an abusive wife and I tried to stay for the sake of my children. When they got old enough to understand, they said, ‘Daddy, it’s OK, just don’t leave us too.’ But out of pride and not wanting my children to see me broken, I kept up the pretence. It was when her new lover came into our home at her invitation and she made it seem like I had no place or authority to speak about how it looked and the impression she was making on our now teenaged children, I realised I was just making excuses and it was best I did as my children had said.