With the recent rains and flooding issues, not to mention the dams and reservoirs that can never seem to reach capacity despite weeks’ worth of water being dumped on the island, a few persons stopped to ask a question that no one seemed to contemplate before but may actually be of national importance: What is baby-making weather?

What exactly

constitutes weather that is ideal for conception? Well, there are various

factors that make for the phenomenon of pregnancy, chief among which is rainy

weather.

Yup, let that precious God-given liquid fall from the sky like manna from heaven for more than three hours, especially in the night or early morning, and everyone will start feeling mellow, cool, calm, collected and especially aroused. Must be something in the air or the raindrops. Like the song says, “every time it rains, I get wet”.

Following up on rain, the next obvious factors are hurricanes. Statistically, nine months after a major hurricane, there is a baby boom that some hospitals can hardly keep up with. Why? Because when people are stuck at home and have little to do and have no way of getting into their regular routine of work, watching TV, reading or playing a video game, they turn to the next best thing that requires little effort and provides a whole lot of gratification – sex! You see, when people are out of their comfort zone, they tend to turn to activities that make them feel comfortable, and intercourse is high on that list of comforting things, so it is a no-brainer.

Added to

this is a lack of electricity. Indeed ‘babymothers’ who had no intention of

being baby-mothers should sue the Jamaica Public Service for their ‘predicament’,

as when the light goes, so do clothes and boundaries! Being unable to use

everyday devices leave people bored and needing something to fill time gaps. And

while it may be easy to say break out a board game and have a good time playing

ludo or a game of poker, the average person will not readily have that at the

forefront of their mind.

When it gets dark and there is no illumination besides lamplight, there is the tendency for individuals to get frisky, as candlelight can be romantic and lends to the creation of an atmosphere conducive to bumping and grinding. So, yes, there is such a thing as ‘baby-making weather’, so if procreation is not on your list of priorities, avoid it at all costs.

— Written by C.W.

The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author. They do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of BUZZ or its employees.