Fix the parenting approach
Dear Editor,
The daily reports of violent incidents committed by males against their female counterparts are high cause for concern. The severity of abuse meted out to women knows no bounds and ranges from verbal abuse to murder.
The various women movements and groups have been lobbying for, among other things, harsher penalties for men who harm women. The truth is we cannot solve a problem without first looking at the cause of the problem, and then we will be in a better position to suggest solutions.
Theorist, such as Sigmund Freud and Jean Piaget, highlighted the importance of guidance from parents/guardians in the different stages of a child’s development. It is important to analyse the nature and nurture of boys as they are products of their reality. Boys tend to be more energetic and physical, while girls, on the other hand, are seen as tender and more emotionally expressive. Girls are given dollies and make-up accessories to stay inside and play, while boys are given water guns, swords and army toys to go outside and explore. Boys are cultured to be bossy and rough, while girls are cultured to be soft and submissive.
The issue of absent fathers in the home increases the pressure on mothers, forcing them to try to play dual roles. The vacancy is then filled by dons who adopt the role of fathers and channel boys ‘water gun energy’ into crime and violence. The ‘father figure dons’, who are used to being aggressive and in charge, are directly and indirectly teaching our boys how to treat women. This is further supported in our beloved dancehall music; as well as glorifying male dominance is relationships, using physical strength and money to usurp authority and control over women.
The solution is multifaceted and involves the Government, the Parenting Commission along with psychologists and social workers strategically developing specific plans aimed at the parenting of boys. The many prisons we have for men in Jamaica are testament that there should be attention-focused at addressing the male ego complex. It is obvious that force is not the answer, so let us try the parenting approach this time.
Hezekan Bolton
h_e_z_e@hotmail.com