Ah, the first dance! Choosing a first dance song is such a different experience for every couple.

The first dance, just as everything else at your wedding, should be very personal. Couples either have a vision of romantically floating around the room in the arms of their love… or dreading the possibility of awkwardly shuffling in the spotlight of their family and friends.

Where to start — choosing the first dance song

There are a few traditional thoughts about how to pick the first dance song. Most first dance songs are chosen based on a song that has a special meaning for the couple — perhaps one that was played a lot when they first met or the tune that was playing as their eyes met across a crowded room! Whilst for some couples, they choose a song that reminds them of an event — a great concert, festival, their first holiday together or special occasion. Other couples, meanwhile, may choose a song to complement the theme of the wedding.

Regardless of whether you’re a dance floor regular or not, there are a few things you can do to guarantee a fun, natural and flawless first dance on your wedding day. Being yourselves and having the time of your lifeare some of the best ways to dispel any fears. Here are helpful pointers to navigate the first dance.

1. Pick a song that suits you both

Don’t choose one because it’s popular at the time or conforms to traditions. If you both really love a song or a particular artiste but think it may not be ideal for a wedding, find a cover or acoustic version.

2. Don’t get trapped into thinking it has to be a slow song

Your first dance should reflect your personalities and be about you both having fun and enjoying the moment.

3. Keep it short and sweet.

Your wedding is a celebration, and you want to keep momentum in full swing. Don’t let the song play out too long — it just dulls the mood. Most songs are three to four-and-a-half minutes. Even with the most impressive choreography, two to three minutes is the perfect length.

4. Think about your outfit and shoes

If you have a few moves planned, make sure your dress allows for them. Long trains, fishtail and mermaid gowns or even some off-the-shoulder designs can be quite restrictive for certain dance moves. Brides should bustle their wedding dress before the first dance if the dress allows.

5. Learn a few dance basics

We all know that “not everybody ah dancer!” That’s fine but, it’s usually the root cause for first dance fears. Having a private dance lesson or two will get you both on the same page and eliminate any awkwardness. It really does make all the difference! Lessons can be scary, but you’d be surprised how much fun they can be. If yours is a more formal wedding, learning to waltz might be a good idea.

NOTE: If you are dancing the waltz for your first dance, this is usually called the Bridal Waltz. In selecting songs for this dance, it’s best to listen to the music and try your steps to the tempo of the music. A song that is not too fast or too slow is highly recommended for it.

6. Be present in the moment and simply enjoy it

There will be some nerves, Champagne consumed, different flooring and the dress always brings another element of complication. So let it be, smile and relax. Whatever happens at the end of the day, you’ve just married the love of your life and get to dance the night away with them!

First dance etiquette

Some brides and grooms invite all of their guests onto the floor after the first dance has ended. However, if you want to go for a more “traditional” route, there is a general agreed-upon etiquette when it comes to the order of the dances:

1. The bride and groom share the first dance.

2. The father of the bride then dances with the bride.

3. The groom may also dance with the mother of the bride.

4. The dance floor then opens up to the bridesmaids and groomsmen as a signal to get everybody out on the dance floor!

Modern first dance trends

Couples are opting for a mash-up of their favourite songs for their first dance, blending genres of music to reflect both romance and their favourite fun vibes.