“Brogad”, the so-called political genius, was at it again in St Elizabeth recently when he acquiesced to the request of a female farmer in the parish for a donkey to take her produce to market as the roads in the vicinity of her farm are in a deplorable condition.

Aided and abetted by the Member of Parliament for the area JC Hutchinson, who stood by with an Anancy-like grin, Prime Minister Andrew Holness noted the significance of the donkey as “the beast of burden” in rural Jamaica, where farming is the main activity, and sympathised with the woman who was effusive in her expressions of gratitude. Needless to say, this donkey incident has become the butt of many jokes and slurs aimed at Prime Minister Holness and his Administration. Aaah, Mr Prime Minister, jackass say the world nuh level. And the road to hell, even one with potholes, is oftentimes paved with good intentions.

One writer noted in 2017 that of all the animals the donkey is perhaps the most important in rural Jamaica, certainly for small farmers in the interior for whom the donkey is an indispensable means of transport to and from their small plots in the hills and mountains. And renowned Jamaican poet Evan Jones in his iconic poem The Song of the Banana Man captures well the importance of the donkey to the Jamaican rural farmer. “Banana day is my special day; I cut my stems an I’m on mi way. Load up di donkey, leave di lan, head down di hill to banana stan.”

Another fan of the four-footed domestic animal observed: “Donkeys have been a cornerstone throughout human existence, and they still prop up entire communities today, ferrying water, food, and crops. They are highly intelligent creatures, sociable and calm, capable of independent thinking and decision-making. They are strong and won’t do something they consider unsafe, which makes them a great, trusted companion… Donkeys are, quite simply, amazing.” One wonders, therefore, why anyone in their right mind would refer to another human being as “a damn jackass”?

As far back as 1901 a missionary wrote in a journal, with a somewhat tongue-in-cheek prejudice: “In the beautiful island of Jamaica, the donkey is the chosen companion of the black and colored people, for it is nearly four hundred years since his first asinine ancestor was introduced there, a short period in advance of the African himself. Without the ass, indeed, the black man in the tropics would feel himself lost, unable perhaps to transact the humble business which fills the measure of his days. Living in the hills and mountains, far distant from the markets of town and city, he could not so well transport the products of his garden and provision grounds as he now does with the assistance of his four-footed friend.” More power to the donkey! After all, even the Jesus Christ rode into Jerusalem on the back of an ass. And lest we forget, even in death, the donkey played a historic role as Samson used the jawbone of an ass to slay his overpowering enemy.

Some years ago it was revealed that there was a growing shortage of donkeys in the island due mainly to the fact that hoodlums were killing them and selling the meat to neighbouring Haitians who consider it a delicacy. In exchange for the meat, the gangsters would get guns and ammunition. I well recall that in the aftermath of Hurricane Gilbert in 1988, donkey meat was being sold, in many cases, to unsuspecting buyers. It has also been said that in the very same parish where the prime minister has offered to help purchase a donkey for the lady farmer, curried donkey meat remains a delicacy. Of course, there have also been many lurid tales about “donkey men” who develop a romantic affection for these beasts of burden of the female kind!

But not to take a “serious thing make joke”, as Prime Minister Holness said, the donkey remains a fixed entity in our colourful cultural practices, such as donkey races and giving donkey rides to excited children at country fairs. In my case, I once jokingly said to my friends that I was seriously thinking of purchasing a donkey to take me to and from my workplace as it was becoming increasingly excruciatingly painful and hazardous to traverse the pothole-riddled roads in my community. Wonder if I should approach the prime minister?

Interestingly, against the backdrop of continuing protests about bad roads by irate citizens all over the island, Prime Minister Holness recently announced that there would be a major islandwide road rehabilitation programme. On the surface, that announcement should be regarded as good news, but many of us took it with a grain of salt, especially as it was juxtaposed against the impending local government and general elections. Then, too, there is the vexing issue of how these roadworks are carried out — creating hazardous situations for motorists and pedestrians, including a dust nuisance, not to mention long delays in completion, cost overruns, and the poor quality of the work. These vexing matters must be addressed, Mr Prime Minister.

It is a common scenario to see newly paved roads literally fall apart and/or become riddled with cavernous potholes after a bout of rain. In this vein, it is no secret that corruption plays a pivotal role in all of this as some contracts are usually awarded to political hacks, some of whom neither have the wherewithal or necessary skills to carry out a good job.

This brings us back to that poor, beleaguered St Elizabeth farmer and the faithful promise Prime Minister Holness made to her. Firstly, let us hope she does get the donkey, one that is sturdy enough and can withstand the treacherous terrain it will have to traverse to bring her produce to points of sale. And let us hope that the prime minister’s act of generosity is not politicised. Already, some cynics are wondering if there will be a grand handing over ceremony with the donkey decorated in green regalia.

In the meantime, in this modern age in which Jamaica is about to celebrate its 61st year of political Independence, it is indeed pathetic if not shameful that a hard-working farmer has to rely solely on a donkey for survival. Perhaps we should all ask for a donkey. Hee-haw, hee-haw!

Lloyd B Smith has been involved in Jamaican media for the past 47 years. He has also served as a Member of Parliament and Deputy Speaker of the House of Representatives. He hails from western Jamaica where he is popularly known as the Governor. Send comments to the Jamaica Observer or lbsmith4@gmail.com.