How do I know when a man is not interested?
It’s tricky sometimes, isn’t it? It’s my duty to remind you that not knowing is really half the fun, but if the suspense is just killing you, here are four simple experiments that will have a guy showing his true colours in no time.
1. Hand him the date on a silver platter. Next time you’re hanging out with Mr Maybe, wait for a lull in the conversation and say something like this: “You know, I’m dying to (insert activity of your choice), but I can’t get any of my friends to go,” then look him right in the eyes with your best happily mystified expression. If the evening ends and he hasn’t asked you out, forget him and move on.
2. Invite him along. If you and this guy are out with a group, talk to a couple of your friends about making a change of location mid-evening, then ask him along. If he demurs, he’s not interested. (You can also do this without the friends. The only problem is that if he doesn’t want to come, you kind of have to go by yourself. On the other hand, if he says yes, it’s just you and him …)
3. Give him the digits. This won’t work in every situation, but if, for instance, you’re taking a class with a guy who seems interested, leave behind something of little or no value, a spiral notebook say, with your name and phone number in it. If he doesn’t call, or if he does, and then only returns your property, you’ll know he’s not into it.
4. Give him the 411. The trick to this one is tone of voice. At some point in the conversation (only once, please), after he’s said something particularly charming, funny or touching, respond generally (“That’s amazing …”) and then say “I like you”, in the same tone of voice you’d use to say, “I like your shirt.” Then drop it. You’ve lost no face and now he has all the information he needs. If he doesn’t use it, there’s your answer.
