Will lack of sex cause a difficult delivery?
Dear Dr Mitchell,
I am 35 and pregnant. I’m not having sex with my husband and my friends say that I will have a hard delivery because I’m not having sex to “loosen up”. Is this true? I’d really rather not have sex, but I don’t want a painful delivery.
-Worried mother-to-be
Dear Worried mother-to-be,
It is actually a myth that you need to be sexually active to create laxity of the vaginal wall to facilitate a normal and a relatively pain-free delivery. Sexual activity during pregnancy is safe unless you have been advised by your doctor to discontinue because of complications in the pregnancy.
Some of the reasons for not indulging in sexual intercourse include a diagnosis of premature labour, premature rupture of the membranes (rupture of the membranes before the onset of labour), a history of recurrent pregnancy loses, a history of cervical incompetence (weakness of the muscles which keep the cervix closed) especially if a stitch has been put in placed to prolong the pregnancy until 38 weeks; and placenta praevia (placenta close to or covering the cervix).
Some women lose interest in sexual activity once pregnancy occurs. This may be due initially to the changes in hormone produced in pregnancy, excessive vomiting in the early part of the pregnancy causing weakness, and a general ill feeling with low energy levels and later on because of discomfort due to the increased size of the abdomen.
On the other hand, some women do in fact have an increased interest in sexual intercourse. Sometimes the lack of interest may be due to the fact that there is a lack of support from the spouse, both financial and emotional, so the pregnant mother becomes very unhappy and withholds sex.
It is important to continue to have sexual relations with your husband during pregnancy unless you have been advised by your doctor to discontinue or reduce the frequency for medical reasons.
Men tend to be easily distracted and if you withhold sex for the 40 weeks of pregnancy, and this could potentially cause marital problems. Your husband could then start sexual relations with a new consort.
It is important that you have an honest and open discussion with your husband and establish why there is a lack of interest in sexual activity, and find out how he feels about it. Involve your obstetrician in the discussion, if it becomes necessary, and come to a decision that is satisfying to both of you. Remember, for some men, sexual intercourse means everything and lack of sexual activity is a common cause of problems in a relationship.
It is thought that for some pregnant women frequent sexual activity will ripen the cervix and help to prevent her from going beyond her expected delivery date. This is due to the fact that semen contains prostaglandins which help to ripen or soften the cervix. However, raspberry tea and thyme also contain cervical ripening agents if you feel that you do not want to be sexually active.
Best wishes with your pregnancy, labour and delivery.
Dr Sharmaine Mitchell is an obstetrician and gynaecologist. Send questions and comments via e-mail to allwoman@jamaicaobserver.com or fax to 968-2025. We regret that we cannot supply personal answers.
