I don’t need a man!

‘I’M strong and independent’ is often the clarion call of single women who believe men should be complements to their lives and not the completion.

Many women take it a step further and say it’s good if the men come along, but they don’t need them to come along.

Winstonieth Thomas, a final year student at the University of the West Indies, said the world has experienced a paradigm shift where it’s not hard for a woman to be the breadwinner or make it work for herself.

“I’m not living in the 40s and 50s where I need to be dependent on a man. Anything a man can do, I can do for myself. I can work if I need to work, so I don’t need him for financial assistance,” she said.

Thomas added that women’s independence has evolved so much that even sexual satisfaction can be had without the involvement of a male counterpart.

She also referred to women who depend on men as “archaic”.

“You can be just as fulfilled without a man and a family,” she declared.

Others shared similar sentiments, with 34-year-old Renee Dwyer saying while men are good to have around, they don’t complete the equation.

“I complete me, not a man. If he completed me and he’s removed from my life, what do I become? Incomplete?”

Dwyer explained that in this age where women are taking a stance and owning their positions in life, there’s no place to feel empty without a man.

“That’s nonsense. I say so because for any successful relationship, you have to believe in yourself. I see a man the way I see a nice pair of shoes or a nice handbag — a complement to my outfit. I’m the full package.”

Dwyer added that what completes her is her own financial security, her education, owning her own home and being able to fully support herself without feeling short of anything.

“After this time the man may come,” she said.

Additionally, relationship counsellor Wayne Powell said some women would say that having men in their lives is desirable, but not mandatory.

“They would contend that they can manage very well on their own and will only want a man for certain activities that only a member of the opposite sex can authentically provide. Some would argue that the substitute is just as good or even better than the authentic,” Powell said.

Also, Powell said there are others who embrace the “shared property” practice and so the need for a genuine service provider is on a part-time basis.

“Some women would reason that having a man is akin to taking on additional baggage that they can well do without,” he said.

Powell explained that in the woman-powered world we now live in, men become intimidated and women often remain single, sometimes not by choice.

However, a female needing a man to complete her is rarely ever the case these days.

“Women are advancing up the corporate ladder and have made more strides in higher education than their male counterparts. As such some men are somewhat intimidated. So these astute career women and qualified professionals may have a challenge attracting men of similar academic backgrounds, and so by design or choice remain single. They would not necessarily need a man for financial support but for companionship,” he said.

–Kimberley Hibbert