The birds, the bees, and your little one
AS we watch our children grow, we want to ensure that they will learn to make rational decisions. A major part of being responsible parents is imparting wisdom in lessons about sex before it’s too late. There is no good reason why parents should shy away from having that discussion with their young children.
So when is the right time to start talking to your child about sex? At the National Family Planning Board (NFPB), we recommend starting that talk from as early as age two. Obviously, toddlers don’t need to know the details of sexual activity, but they certainly need to know about their own bodies. At this age, children need to know the correct names for their body parts and should not be afraid of saying the word ‘penis’ or ‘vagina’. After all, those are the medically correct names for the body parts. Once this comfort in identifying body parts is established, parents can add new topics for discussion as the children grow older.
By the time children turn five, they should understand that babies are not dropped off by storks, and that birds and bees do not mate like humans. It is our duty as parents to dispel all myths. We cannot place all responsibility on the school system to tackle this. If we want the best for our children, we have to play an active role in teaching them about these very important issues.
By the age of ten, a child should understand how the reproductive system works. Some people may think it is too early, but at this age a child should also be aware of sexually transmitted infections, how they are transmitted, and how they can be prevented. Parents should also discuss with their children the possible consequences of having sex too early and the issues that arise from adolescent pregnancy, as many young girls can begin menstruating and young boys can begin to produce sperm around this time, making it possible for girls to get pregnant. This stage in a child’s life is their most curious stage, and they need to have their questions answered honestly by you.
Many parents who had their children during their teenage years usually hope that their children will not go down the same road. Be honest about the struggles you endured as an adolescent parent, steering your child away from following in your footsteps. This is a reality for many Jamaicans, and it creates what we call ‘the cycle of poverty’. When an adolescent parent suffers through poverty, the child is likely to suffer the same plight. And if that child does not make it out and also has an adolescent pregnancy, the cycle continues unabated.
There are certain life lessons that only we can teach our children. Let us not shy away from ‘that talk’; instead, let us start the discussion early, without being too graphic. This makes it easier in the long run and may save your child from making irresponsible sexual decisions.
Renée Gauntlett is the communications & public relations officer at the National Family Planning Board.
