Signs that things shouldn’t go beyond the first date

FIRST dates are notorious for many things — like nightmarish experiences, awkward moments, and personalities that you just did not bargain for. Fortunately for those among us who didn’t sign up to have their time wasted, first dates also usually carry the gift of red flags. That said, there are instances in the dating world when you should honour the “first impressions last” rule — and here are few warning signs that you really shouldn’t go beyond the first date.

It is clear that your intentions don’t align

It’s important to ascertain what it is that your date is looking for. If you are not in the business of having your time wasted, then once you have established that you both are not on the same page, for example, if he wants to have fun while you are looking to start a serious relationship, then a second date really would be off the cards.

There is just no connection

You spent several hours out getting to know each other, but there is just no chemistry between you and your date. If you don’t share any of the same interests, can’t seem to engage in conversation without losing steam on things to talk about, then you might not be the right fit. Going on a second date really would be a waste of time.

Your date seems more interested in his/her phone (and everything else) than talking to you

We can all tell when someone is not interested in us; it’s not rocket science. If your date is there, but is not present, or he/she seems more interested in what is on the screen of their phones or prefers to chat and laugh on the phone all while you are in front of them, this is someone you don’t want to waste another minute of your time with. Their actions are a clear sign of disrespect and it means that they would much prefer to entertain whomever they are talking to on the phone than they you.

They are rude and obnoxious

Chances are people will do their best to show their best face, which includes pretending to be pleasant, even if they are not that way generally. However, some people can slip out of character or are not as good at hiding their true selves. So, if, for example, they complain about everyone and everything, don’t apologise for being late, are rude to the bar, waiting staff, and other guests, then this is a sign to run to the hills.

They are already jealous

You agreed to see where things go with a first date but instead, they are acting like you accepted a marriage proposal. They’re asking who is texting when your phone chimes, seem overly interested in knowing about your ex, proceed to tell you that your dress is too revealing, or even ask why you are smiling with a male passer-by. This is a clear sign that entertaining this person may spell trouble.

They talk about their ex the entire time

Sure enough, on the first date, there might be mention of an ex depending on the line of questions between you and your date. However, if the ex becomes the centre of the conversation and they dwell on the person the entire time, they should perhaps focus on healing their wounds first.

They act like the world revolves around them

If your date is a control freak and acts as though the world revolves around them, this is a red flag. If your date also spends the entire time talking about him/herself and seems uninterested in you, and redirects the conversation to him/herself when it strays, this is not only egotistic, but smacks of control issues.