Children’s voices matter
CHILD Month 2022 is being celebrated under the theme ‘Listen Up, Children’s Voices Matter’. How can parents ensure that their children are heard, beginning even before they can clearly express themselves?
Here are some tips from early childhood practitioner Maureen Dennis.
Talk to them
1) Ask your child what activities they would like to do. Choosing to do this will build their self-confidence. For younger children who can’t communicate such, take your clues from what they seem to enjoy, and repeat these activities as often as they like. When they are part of the decision-making process, children feel validated.
2) Make conversation a priority, even if you both don’t quite understand each other. When you take time out to just talk, and to respond with enthusiasm to what they say, your child will know that you’re interested in what they have to say.
3) Put the devices down when you’re talking to them. You can’t fully engage them when you are tuned out on your cellphone. We know life gets busy, but 10 minutes without your device won’t hurt.
4) Make a habit of paying attention to what your child has to say. Don’t dismiss their feelings or opinions because of their age or because you’re too busy. If you don’t have the time to engage them at the minute they’re expressing themselves, make a mental note to pick it up again when time allows, but try to never forget.
Listen to them
1) Your kids experience the same emotions that you do, even though they may not yet have the language skills to express them. They also get frustrated, sad, jealous and embarrassed. Know how to help them deal with these emotions in a healthy way, so their frustrations don’t devolve into self-harming behaviour.
2) Learn how to read non-verbal cues. Your children, especially younger kids, will express their feelings through facial expressions, body language, behaviour and play. Sometimes they may act out their feelings in problematic ways. Know when to spot these cues and how to react so the child is helped, not harmed or embarrassed.
3) If something is happening with your child, they are more likely to share it with you, using their own cues, than with a stranger. Make sure your ears and eyes are perked up to find these cues.
4) After they have expressed themselves, help them to learn to manage their feelings in positive and constructive ways. By listening to what they say and by observing their behaviour, you will be able to figure out what they’re feeling, and help them identify, express, and manage those feelings better. If further help is needed, enlist the help of an expert in child psychology for guidance.
5) Above all, be a role model. Children learn how to express themselves by watching their parents — how you behave, what you talk about, and how you interact with others. Make sure that you’re always being a positive influence.
