Dear TEENage,

Since first form, I’ve always made the effort to be in the top five in my class. However, based on the grades on my report, I knew that I had missed that target big time.

Last year was a hard year for me, based on the transition from second to third form in which my classmates for two years were split into different classes and re-adjustment had to take place. Also, there were other issues that took my focus off schoolwork.

My mom has decided to take all my privileges, limiting me to home and school. No cellphone, no Facebook®, no cable, no life!

I admit I’ve messed up, but I can’t live under these restrictions. I’ll break, I just know it. I want to runaway. That’s my only way out as I see it. I know mom will flip, but… sigh. I can’t live under her rules. I don’t want her to worry though and I haven’t yet worked out all the details of running away, but I don’t see any other way to escape this.

Help.

— Poised To Run

Dear Poised To Run,

Sorry to burst your bubble, but running away is not the answer.

If you can’t get along with your mom, there’s no guarantee that you’ll be able to get along with the next person you choose to stay with. When that happens and you get in a disagreement, what are you going to do? Run away again and be on the move for the rest of your life?

The fact that you even considered running away shows that you haven’t matured to the stage where you are prepared to take responsibility for your actions.

Also, it’s a good thing that you haven’t chosen to be blind to the consequences of running away. Discarding the fact that you haven’t yet worked out the specifics, thus, is not even sure where you’ll put your head at nights, you mentioned that your Mom would be worried.

By considering this, it shows that you love your mom enough to give her a last thought and even if you ran away, you would also be a wreck, knowing that you made your mom sad. Apart from that, you need to consider the fact that your moral influence will be gone. You won’t feel that innate obligation to listen to the words of your new guardian as you would your Mom, and so you would practically be on your own.

The question is, are you ready for such a responsibility? You’re in third form, where will you get money, clothes and food from without strings attached?

Stay and accept your punishment. Let your motivation be to do great, so as to never fall in that situation again.

TEENage Advice Team