Most families spoke poor English and bad patois for generations; now the few who master English still speak bad patois. Poor Miss Lou, discredited by latter-day campus experts, which means the masses don’t even speak proper patois.

Wikipedia says we are English-speaking and a Christian nation — both risible statements; the noun is proved by the many churches; the adjective is not a valid descriptor of our conduct. If we found oil now we would still behave unchristian-like — coarse, criminal, fearful and not speak English. To live well we must change and it begins with self, hopefully soon.

English takes us places. It is also important to the many who go nowhere much but sustain the less sexy parts of our society — sanitation, household, farm, janitorial, construction workers — as the chemicals they use may hurt production and poison us all if they don’t know English.

In our felicitous progression to educated society status how do we channel degree demand into competencies in skills and English we need? Good primary or secondary schooling and mastery of English is the bedrock of the nation. In movies, a hero or heroine falls for a waitress or barman as they “speak the same language”. It does not happen here!

Our social gap is not colour or class; mastery of English is the up escalator. And you can’t prove me wrong as you don’t speak English. My female friends have dates in New York — buff guys who work on buildings by day and bartend at night for minimum wages, live in tenements; love model planes and golf, went to Grade 9 but speak English and read a lot. This is not our men.

A recent visit to two British primary schools rated in the top five per cent left my head spinning as I expected “lily white” campuses. One had students of 30 nations who spoke 40 languages. As we went around the principal asked kids to say the language they spoke at home and excited little hands shot up — Hindi, Twi, Bangladeshi, Polish, English, French, Jamaican patois, Spanish, Romanian.

The kids are taught English in English by regular teachers. Several kids of refugees spoke no English but in a term they coped and were proficient in a year. A teacher of “English as an additional language” (EAL) assists some after school. The fastest learners were African and Indian kids who already spoke several native languages.

Somalis were slow as they tend to stay in their language group and don’t practice. When kids who spoke six or more languages were in the same class, work group, or football team, the default was English. All learn. Their teachers teach English or indirectly in the subject to every class — uncompromising immersion. It works for our patois kids in London. Can it work here? Or do we spend billions teaching it “as a foreign language” as we teach Mandarin? So let’s teach Mandarin then as it’s the future.

Business, church and political leaders must stand for English. I see well brought up young people trying to be roots with patois. Why go down to voters, lift them? Stop it and lead! If your teacher was trained over 25 years ago she will speak, read, write English and know grammar; after God only knows!

Most of us speak English to “elders and betters” and patois to small people — disrespect! Most leaders speak English; the Irish, Welsh and Scots among us speak English, not the brogues of their homelands as they know what succeeds.

English is the mark of progress and all can learn from the radio or TV. Recall Rex Nettleford’s extraordinary grasp of patois and English? His skills were not gifts but work — copy good speech models and repeat. Meryl Streep, Denzel Washington, Johnny Depp, Eddie Murphy are masters of English usage and do any character they are paid to play.

Denzel in Mighty Quinn is a laid-back West Indian cop; Meryl is a clipped British Margaret Thatcher in Iron Lady and both earn huge sums to speak roles. My grandkids love to visit Duchess Blossom of Red Hills whose menagerie of rescued dogs, cat phone and birds are a joy.

If Othello, her multi-hued parrot, can speak English then every child should master English after five to nine years with supposed English-speaking teachers. She speaks, her Macaw cocks his head, listens, repeats and learns English. Rocket science? Do we need parrots in schools?

English calms people and may reduce crime. Jimmy Moss-Solomon’s thesis that it is not possible to quarrel in English is compelling. People I know with impeccable English resort to patois when angry. The discipline, vocabulary and nuance to cuss in English are beyond most and both sides have to understand to have the effect.

Patois is for cussing; it overwhelms those who speak none, impales those who do and is cathartic to the speaker. The English use four-letter words in boring repetition; they lack our variety and greige of cloths — fabric by retail, wholesale but sadly we cannot cuss to prosperity.

Cussing is underrated. A good Jamaican cuss-out is theatre — often tragedy. English can change this. Business must encourage and reward English in the workplace. English needs a champion in arts and academia too; the drama of pulpit and political platforms must show that bilingual is best. It is unfair for my vote to be set off against a slew of illiterates who cannot argue issues.

Listen to your MP or councillor and reject those who speak patois to you; they do not respect you or mean you well as all understand English. Let’s use English in 2015. If we build it, they will come.

Big stars send their kids to top schools here and abroad; their kids are bilingual, so don’t be fooled. I cringe at some radio pastors; God works miracles, why are they illiterate? Mr Broadcasting Commission, English needs a fillip.

Cabinet spends $81 billion, so we learn English, yet State agencies spend millions on advertising, patois renditions that undermine it makes no sense! Civil servants, police, military, teachers, nurses behave to fit the job so let them use English too.

This might be the only time a child hears English. Some say patois is our reality, but so is murder, rape, and farm thievery, but do we put these on bill boards? Six people on a BA flight asked staff to write up their forms — what a shame in 2015?

No more Mr Nice Guy, we must embarrass and/or incentivise illiterate adults — go to classes, dummy! Patois, voice of my soul; English, argot of success. The former is a gift, English is work. Let us work at it — listen, repeat, get it right.

Stay conscious, my friend!

Dr Franklin Johnston is a strategist, project manager and advises the minister of education. franklinjohnstontoo@gmail.com

Louise ‘Miss lou’ Bennett-Coverley has been discredited by latter-day campus experts.