A sad fact of life is that we all age. Body parts sag, energy levels wane, bones become brittle, and for many, the body becomes more susceptible to illness which can become chronic if not treated properly.

While we may try to delay the ageing process through adopting a healthy lifestyle, concoctions of vitamins and serums, and even plastic surgery, there is no denying the effects of the ageing process which are inevitable.

Ageing not only affects the individual but also the people around them. It can be especially painful for family members as they watch once strong and independent loved ones slowly change and become frail before their eyes. In many instances the responsibility of care provision shifts from the parent to the adult child, and requires putting in place a sound support system.

Since a nursing home is a last resort in Jamaican culture, family members having to balance their responsibility of care, and holding down a job can lead to greater complication.

“Having an ailing mother myself, I know first-hand the struggles to balance her care, my own family and career. Added to this is the emotional roller-coaster the adult child experiences particularly, when your loved one is severely ill. It’s downright painful to see them literally deteriorate before your eyes, you feel so helpless.

“It was extremely frustrating at times trying to find the right person who could care for my mother properly. As I started to speak with friends and family I soon realised that many of them were in a similar situation,” Jacqueline Hall-Stewart, director of Angels4U Home Care Ltd explained. “Angels4U Home Care prides itself in being able to provide carers (angelites) who understand the needs of their clients, and are able to take care of their day-to-day requirements in a caring and compassionate way. Thus, the aim is to provide each client with optimum care giving him/her peace of mind,” Hall-Stewart continued.

Angels4U Home Care is said to provide carers for any person in need, in the comfort of their home. Hall-Stewart explained that her staff’s training, varied experience and a genuine passion for what they are doing equip them to deal with any situation.

“It’s rewarding knowing that you are able to help someone reach a certain stage or even just to make them smile. This is a big gratification for me. I can say this is my passion, which I believe was developed from seeing the sacrifice my mom made to care for her family and others,” angelite Taniesha Fearon said. Fearon who holds a diploma in practical nursing and is a trained teacher, said she could not imagine herself doing anything else.

However, unlike Fearon, her colleague Alecia Graham fell in love with the profession by chance. Out of necessity she enrolled in school while in England.

“It was the easiest way to get a job. While I was doing the course I really got to like it,” Graham said. “Sometimes it’s hard, but when you do something and you see how grateful the person is, you feel good. I always put myself in the patient’s place and think, ‘How would I want someone to treat me if I were in their place?’ That gives me empathy.”

The Angels4U angelites work with different clients who have varying ailments, including diabetes, dementia, Alzheimer’s disease, hypertension, cancer, and depression.

Here are a few tips on what to consider when looking after a loved one who is elderly and/or ailing.

Treat your loved ones the same way you did before they were sick/elderly

“Talk to them. Remind them of things they used to do. Do things to stimulate their memory,” said Fearon. “Try to let them feel as normal as possible.”

“Take them out. Do recreational activities. Take them for lunch, to the beauty salon. Just come by and spend the day,” said Graham. “Whatever they like doing, make the effort to do that with them.”

Ensure they have all they need

“This goes without saying. But make sure there is food in the house, especially if they have special dietary needs. They should never be out of medication or any other medical supplies. Make sure they attend their medical appointments, take them to the doctor and dentist,” said Graham.

Show love

“Sometimes you can’t be there. But if it’s even to call, that calms them down. Reassure them. Though you can’t always be there, they should still feel your presence. The lady I am currently working with was having a rough week recently. Her son called during the week. At first she didn’t remember him. But as they spoke she started to remember. The next day when I got to work she was a different person,” said Graham.

Make the time

“They are still your loved ones, still a part of the family. Try to enjoy every single minute because you don’t know when they can be taken away from you,” said Fearon.