Patricia Oberli, licensed counselling psychologist, says people must be deliberate about self-care and self-compassion to cope with the challenges brought on by the novel coronavirus pandemic, and in life in general.

Oberli made the recommendation during a JN Circle Thrive Life Class, a discussion recently on the topic: ‘We Have Made It! Lessons from Surviving 2020.’

“Choose happiness. Life is 10 per cent of what happens to you, and 90 per cent how you choose to respond,” said Oberli, who was a guest presenter at the forum.

“The brain takes information from our senses, muscles and facial muscles and sends the message that you are okay. For example, when you smile. This way, the brain will not prepare you for fight or flight because there really is no need for such a huge stress response,” added Oberli.

She reminded the audience that self-compassion is not self-pity, but means treating yourself with the love and respect that you want from others.

Oberli argued that some people are raised on a soundtrack of negativity and it is up to the individual to change that soundtrack with words of affirmation. She warned that words of affirmation must be practical and truthful, for example, ‘I am doing my best’; ‘I deserve my successes’ and ‘I have a right to say no’.

“Set and enforce your own boundaries [and] practice saying ‘no’ without the accompanying anxiety. If a request is harmful to you emotionally, or even practically, you are entitled to say ‘no’. Put your needs first.

“If you are too stressed because you are taking on more than you can manage, you will be of no use to yourself, or to the persons you love. Ask yourself why you do it. The answer can be life-changing,” advised Oberli.

Season two of the JN Circle Thrive Together Life Class seeks to empower JN members and customers to thrive as they prepare for 2021; and is aired every Wednesday at 6:30 pm.

The discussions focus on issues relating to self-care, goal-setting/self-actualisation, parenting and financial wellness.

Persons can register to join the sessions via Zoom platform, or watch and participate via the JN Group’s Facebook page.

The discussions include interviews, lectures and gamification. Participants also have the opportunity to win prizes during the sessions.

Interested persons can register for the online series by visiting www.myjncircle.com.