Thieves for their robbery,

Have authority,

When judges steal themselves.

— Shakespeare, Measure for Measure

Thieves and stealing have been a part of man’s existence from the dawn of time. In fact, stealing is so established in the psyche of humans, that it almost became acceptable in society, even though it’s not liked. In some jurisdictions, stealing is such a serious offence, that the hand of the perpetrator is cut off, in public too.

Can you imagine that happening here? There would be a lot of one-armed men and women walking around. But stealing is a way of life, and even though it’s frowned on, it’s still tolerated to a certain degree, as long as it’s not too serious.

“Cho, a nuh nutten big him tief, just a likkle sumting.”

“As soon as yuh put down sumting dem tief it, but nutten big, just some banana.”

But the fact is, whatever you steal — big or small — tief is tief. Anyone who knows the story of Les Miserables will know that a thief was hounded by a policeman for many years in France, all because he stole a loaf of bread.

Maybe you’ll say, “Oh, that’s petty theft, it was just a loaf of bread.” But the fact is, he stole, and tief is tief, no matter the amount of what you may have stolen. There’s this old English saying, “In for a penny, in for a pound.” In other words, whether you steal a penny or a pound, you’re going to prison, so might as well steal the pound.

So that’s where we’ll steal away to today, to the land of filch, where a tief is a tief, right after these response to my views on ‘Unlovable’.

Hi Tony,

I cannot see men performing the same type of act as the unsavoury exhibition displayed by those three women at the Jamaica Pegasus hotel. Those women are obviously of the same ilk, with the same disposition. They are on the island without men, and spew their vitriol wherever they go. They would not behave the way they did if they were in the company of men. They are indeed unloved and unlovable.

Alfred

Hello Teerob,

Is suh dem stay, that’s the way they are. They go away to America and come back here like they are better than us. I see them all the time, acting arrogant, loud, boisterous and boorish. Somehow they think that having travelled, they are superior to those who still live here, all because they can flash a few US dollars. If you saw the basement hovels where some of them live in America, you’d be shocked.

Lorna

Few things are worse than being robbed. Anyone who robs is a thief, and every thief is a liar. Some may be violent, as they hold you up at gunpoint or with a knife, while others may break into your house or car. Some will skilfully relieve you of your cash from your pocket, without you even knowing it, as they operate with surgical dexterity.

I understand that some pickpockets even submerge their fingers in hot water to keep them supple so that they are more nimble and take on the form of pincers, sliding in and out of your pocket without you even knowing.

Many victims have had their pockets cut and the cash extracted without feeling a thing. Back in medieval England they were known as cutpurses, for that’s what they did, cut your purse and purloin your pennies or pounds.

Then there are those who will use sophisticated methods, such as scamming people out of their life’s savings, and now they have electronic means as they manipulate banking information and bleed people’s accounts dry.

No matter what the method is, a thief is a thief, and no matter what the amount, a tief is still a tief.

‘A thief is a thief, whether he steals a diamond or a cucumber.’ — Indian proverb.

‘The number one rule of thieves is that nothing is too small to steal.’ — Jimmy Breslin.

‘Jealousy is a dog’s bark which attracts thieves.’ — Karl Kraus.

‘Three groups spend other people’s money: children, thieves, politicians. All three need supervision.’ — Dick Armey.

‘The great thief leads away the little thief.’ — Diogenes.

‘We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great thief to public office.’ — Aesop.

‘Save a thief from the gallows and he will cut your throat.’ — Proverb.

‘Thief from thief, God laugh.’ — Jamaican proverb.

There have been so many saying about thieves and stealing, some from eminent scholars such as Diogenes and Aesop, and yet, the practice is still pervasive. It’s just the nature of man, and people have been trying to explain it, condone it, condemn it, justify it or even accept it for centuries.

“Oh, we just have to live with thieves but try to keep them to a minimum.”

Some say that poverty is the driving force behind stealing. That may be true to some extent, but the fact remains, there has always been poverty, but not all people who are poor are thieves. Thieves rank among the wealthy too, and many people, even though already rich, still concoct ingenious ways to steal.

Some people may be genuinely hungry, and may pilfer to satisfy that hunger, but most poor people are not thieves. When the rich steal, it’s called white-collar crime, to put an air of respectability to it, if not whitewash the act, making it not as disgusting as it really is.

“Oh, she’s not really a common thief like those pickpockets downtown, she just manipulated some bank accounts, that’s all.”

We seem to have a lot of white-collar crime nowadays, with none other than our women taking centre stage too, and we all know, women often upstage and outdo men in whatever they do.

In the news recently, there has been a spate of high-profile robberies, allegedly perpetrated by women who have manipulated accounts, not their own, in some major financial institutions. Some have been arrested, others pleaded innocent, while some have been sent to prison.

The most high-profile case is that of the great Usain Bolt, whose account has been depleted from almost US$13 million to US$12,000. That’s a lot of money and the case has been garnering international attention. After all, it’s Usain Bolt.

Every thief has a rationale why they steal. “I was hungry, I was sick, my children need clothes.” The fact is, the end does not justify the means, and a tief is a tief. But why are so many high-profile women implicated in these big money stealing rackets?

Someone said that it’s because some women love to live beyond their means, and not only do they want to keep up with the Joneses, they ARE the Joneses, they ARE the bar that others strive to meet.

Some women set extremely high standards and yearn for a lifestyle that normal legal financing cannot sustain. Just recently I saw an ad on TV promoting one of those soap opera romance shows. In it there’s a man and a woman in bed, and she casually says to the man, “Don’t tell me that you’re broke, if you can’t afford to pay my bills, just let me know, for if you can’t, I’ll find another man who will, I will not lower my lifestyle.”

That really sums up how some women think, and if they can’t find a man to finance them, they will take matters into their own hands, by means fair or foul.

But back to those high-profile cases swirling around our media landscape regarding those women who allegedly stole millions from their financial institutions. I often wonder, did they really think that they’d have got away with it, knowing that there’s an electronic paper trail that would lead right back to them? Or did think that they’re so clever that they could beat the system?

I’ve always maintained, the only way you have a big chance of stealing and getting away with it is if you steal cash, and then flee. Plus, why steal so much? Bolt had US$12.7 million in his account and they cleaned out almost everything. Couldn’t they have left even a half? But thieves have no conscience, are liars, and have no sympathy.

The saying is, ‘There is no honour among thieves,’ and a thief given half a chance, will lie and commit murder too. Some are caught and make the news, but there are others who pillage, plunder, purloin, and we don’t hear a peep about them. Crime does pay sometimes.

A tief is a tief and some get away, while others pay the price.

“The jury, passing on the prisoner’s life, may in the sworn twelve, have a thief or two, guiltier than him they try.” — Shakespeare, Measure for Measure.

In the book Dante’s Inferno that chronicles a man’s journey through hell, there is a creature named Geyron, the image of fraud, which is the worst sin ever, for it is concocted and perpetrated by man. Geryon has three beautiful faces, and three gnarled bodies, enticing to look at from the top, but hideous below. Fraudulent. Of all the sins in Dante’s Inferno, lust, gluttony, greed, anger, heresy, violence, the worst was treacherous fraud. Geryon exists.

More time.

seido1yard@gmail.com

Footnote: I feel really aggrieved that once again no athlete from karate was recognised at the annual sportsman and sportswoman awards ceremony. Karate has had the distinction of being represented at the Pan Am Games for the first time ever, held in Lima, Peru, a few years ago, and last year Jamaica medalled for the first time ever at the Commonwealth Games held in Birmingham, England. Despite all these accomplishments from none other than female athletes too, they were given no recognition. Disrespectful.