Crabbed age and youth cannot live together,

Youth is full of pleasure, age is full of care

Youth is full spirit, age’s breath is short,

Youth is noble, age is lame,

Youth is hot and bold, age is weak and cold,

Youth is wild, age is tame,

Age I do abhor thee,

Youth I do adore thee.

— Shakespeare

After reading that quote above, it’s pretty clear that youth has the edge over age any day of the week. There is no positive comparison between youth and age, as in almost every situation, youth is going to triumph. I don’t mean youth as in a baby, for obviously infants cannot fend for themselves.

If you live long enough though, you’ll revert to the ways of infancy — no teeth, poor eyesight, can’t walk, always drooling, peeing and messing up yourself. It’s not pretty, as both ends of the age range are similar. They do say, ‘Once a man, twice a child.’

What I’m referring to is youth in its prime, a young man or woman, full of vim, vigour and verve, as opposed to a doddering, decrepit, downtrodden dullard. So, don’t believe them when they say that old age brings pleasures, and you must look forward to the golden years. It’s baloney, balderdash, bunkum, bovine crap, a lot of hooey.

The golden years are now, when you can still run up and down like a horse, dance to your heart’s content, and make love over and over like there’s no tomorrow.

At least that’s what I was told by an old timer who whispered to me “Don’t get old, it’s no fun.” We’ll see why, right after these youthful responses to what I had to say about ‘Flation’.

Hi Tony,

Inflation has been defined as price increases driven by corporate greed, eg price gouging. Wow! A little harsh, I would think. I would agree partially with this definition. Some businesses are forced to increase their prices due to economic conditions forced on them. As for women defined as Hoflation, requiring the man to have at least $80,000 in his pocket, men don’t carry that much cash on them anymore. Credit cards are the thing to carry nowadays.

Edgar

Teerob,

Hoflation indeed. Where do you come up with these descriptions? The women are going to have your head, but you speak truth, brother, you speak truth. I have been a victim of hoflation and other men who I know have to settle for a church sister because they cannot keep up with the inflation… er hoflation. Church sisters are less expensive and don’t demand much.

David

I was in the pharmacy recently where I overheard a poor old lady lamenting the high cost of her medication. She muttered to whoever would lend an ear, “Look at my bill, it cost too much to get sick, too much to live and too much to die.”

And that is the plight of many older folks who are not enjoying the so-called pleasures of growing old. Of course, young people get sick too, but it’s a guarantee that as you get older, the probability of you having health issues will increase. Nobody escapes, nobody goes to Heaven alive.

And it doesn’t have to be anything debilitating either, but just the regular wearing out of parts, such as the knee and hip joints, that cause discomfort or pain.

So, if you can do it, don’t get old, for it brings no joy. In fact, it was George Bernard Shaw who said, “Youth is wasted on the young.” Members of the Hippie culture back in the 1960s in the USA also said, “Live fast, die young and leave a pretty corpse.”

I’m not sure if I totally agree with that, for there’s merit to growing old and living your life to the fullest, enjoying as many experiences as you can, but I can appreciate where they’re coming from. When you see how old age mash up some people it can really make you shudder and hope that fate does not befall you.

“Last scene of all that ends this strange, eventful history, is second childishness and mere oblivion. I am sans teeh, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.” — Shakespeare.

So when I say don’t grow old, I don’t literally mean not to grow old, but rather grow older without calling down age upon yourself. There are some people who as they hit late 40s or 50s they start to age, look and act really old.

“The man is barely forty eight but acting like he’s seventy eight.”

That being said though, there are certain characteristics that emerge when people get old, although some folks try to mask them. Ironically, there are some who, although young, exhibit the characteristics of age.

“Your Lordship, though not clean past your youth, have yet some smack of age in you, some relish of the saltness of time.” — Shakespeare.

Still, no matter how hard you try to slow it down or even stop it, there is no fountain of youth, no elixir, no pill to retard the ageing process. The passage of time still creeps up on you, sometimes it rushes, and with it the ravages of growing old. It can be brutal, and at times it stares you in the face.

A man I know told me that he made such a mistake when he married a woman who was older than he was.

“Now that I am 70, she is 78. What am I doing with a 78-year-old woman?”

It may sound cruel, but he was genuinely perturbed of the prospect of being married to a woman who was almost 80 years old, even though he was still a sprightly 70.

“When I was 30 and she was 38 it was fine, even when we were 40 and 48, but 70 and 78 is quite daunting.”

It’s an unfortunate fact, but in general, many men do seem to age more gracefully than most women do, as a man of 70 will look and act younger than a woman of that age.

That’s why many a mother will advise her son not to marry a woman who is older than him. Of course, there are exceptions, but look around and see for yourself.

“It is not strange, that desire should so many years outlive performance.” — Shakespeare

Oh my, in other words, the mind is willing but the flesh is weak, especially old flesh. That’s another reason not to grow old. Apparently, even when you age, desire does not leave you. This was verified to me by some old friends of mine who told me that even though they are old and pop down in their 80s, desire is still there.

They still see young women, they still yearn, still lust, but sadly that’s all they can do. Of course, there are enhancers such as Viagra and other boosters, but then again, at that age, and with no money, not many younger women would indulge them. But still they look, leer and lust. Growing old can be cruel.

That’s why you should not be judgemental of those cashy older men who get involved with young women. Maybe they’re trying to regain their youth even though it’s hardly likely that they’ll be able to perform as well as they used to in their prime.

Many take it in stride.

“I may not be able to sprint the rounds like I used to, but I can still jog for a good steady distance.”

“It’s not how long you make it, it’s how you make it long.”

When I ask those old men why they get involved with young girls, their answer is of one accord, “I’m almost 80 years old, what am I doing with an 80-year-old woman? At that age, all they want to do is sleep.”

As harsh as that may sound, you can’t argue with that logic.

“He hath born in himself beyond the promise of his age, doing in the figure of a lamb, the feats of a lion.” — Shakespeare .

It was The Crusaders, featuring Randy Crawford, who sang in Street Life.

‘Street life, you can run away from time,

Street life, for a nickel for a dime,

Street life, but you better not get old

Or you’re gonna feel the cold.’

Even as you get older it doesn’t mean that you have to get old. Stay as young as you can for as long as you can, for based on what I’ve seen and heard, growing old has no positive pleasures. Don’t grow old.

More time.

seisdo1yard@gmail.com

Footnote: Jamaican theatre has always shone brightly for decades, from the highly esteemed Pantomime, Miss Lou and Ranny, Bim and Bam and others. Well, the joy continues with many plays currently being presented for our entertainment. Basil Dawkins continues to produce plays that not only make us laugh, but make us think, as they touch on social, domestic and relationship issues. His current play, Once Upon a Watch Night is a theatrical triumph that really hits home. Actors Dennis Titus and Deon Silvera really shine in this production, making one person in the audience exclaim, “That is just too close for comfort for me.” Jamaican theatre continues to provide us with thought-provoking entertainment, and Basil Dawkins is truly a driving force in our theatre industry.