Dear Mrs Macaulay, I am on my daughter’s birth certificate as her father. She is two years old. Her mother is living with another man, and has told numerous people that he is the father. She calls me a deadbeat, even though I provide for our daughter.

She posts our daughter on her social media, using the other man’s last name. What can I do? There is no doubt that I am the father, and the records state this, but I don’t like the confusion, including to my daughter, about who her father is.

I am allowed to visit and spend time with her only when her mother feels like it. I can understand your frustration, emotional upset and deep concern about your daughter’s welfare and development.

I can understand your frustrations, emotional upset and deep concern about your young daughter’s welfare and development.  You need not despair, as the law is strongly on your side and you must use the law to not only enjoy your legal rights as a father, but to ensure that you are in a position to protect your child’s welfare and development, and also ensure that she enjoys her own legal rights.

What must you do?  You must go to the Family Court to have orders made in your favour and to prevent the mother from continuing with her wrongful conduct and engaging the child in injurious exposures on social media and fraudulently using her current partner’s name as the child’s, contrary to the legal registration of you as the child’s father.  The Children (Guardianship and Custody) Act provides and ensures that both father and mother have equal rights to custody of their children.    The Act also ensures a child’s right to have a meaningful relationship with both parents, which includes you as the registered father, which occurred because the mother named you as the father in a sworn document and you accepted this and were so registered. So, even though the child resides with the mother, you and your child have legal rights to have a close familial relationship with each other, and the child’s rights also extends to her having a close familial relationship with your extended family.

Since the mother, by her conduct, clearly has no respect for your rights in law or in fact, you must go to the Family Court in your parish, to  have the clerk prepare your applications to set things right and place the mother in a legally binding position, so that any breach by her would constitute a breach of a court order, which would result in serious legal consequences for her.   You have a duty to act in this way as your daughter clearly has no one else to protect her and her rights.

I assume that you still have the screenshots of the mother’s exposures of your daughter on social media.  You must secure these.  I also assume that you have a certified copy of your daughter’s birth certificate.   You need these for your case, so that the summons of your applications can be prepared, on the basis of you being the registered father.  The social media screenshots will be needed to show the judge, but the clerk may also wish to see them before preparing the summons and your affidavit in support.

You must apply for the following orders:-

• For legal custody of your child. This  would in all probability be a joint custody order, unless the judge determines otherwise, seeing the mother’s exposure of the child and use of the other man’s surname, and that she permits your visits only when she feels like it, when she has no right to do so, and is acting in breach of yours and you child’s legal right to visit with each other and develop a father and daughter relationship, and to have her meet and get to know your family members as well.  In considering this, the judge would also be guided  by the mother’s conduct and if he/she considers it egregious enough, the “care and control” (having the child live with her) which she now has may be taken away from her, if you have the facilities to have the  day-to-day care of your child plus sole legal custody rather than joint legal custody.
• An application for you to have access to your child on specific dates and times, generally during holidays and special days, like your birthday or your mother’s and other close family members. As I have stated already, you have legal right to this.  This is also protected by the Act stated above.  You must ensure that the clerk adds this to your application as well and the mother has no right to curtail this.
• An application for an order that the mother stops exposing your very young child on social media and removes the photos already there, as this kind of exposure is dangerous and  contrary to the wholesome and secure upbringing of your child as she would also be exposed to predators.  The Child Care and Protection Act provides for reports  to be made if any child is in need of proper care and protection and investigation could be done and action taken against the mother, if you prove your assertions of what you say she is doing.  Orders stopping exposures of children on social media platforms have been made by our courts because of the endangering of the child’s safety and privacy (a constitutional right)  and emotional and mental effects on the child of such exposure.  Your child is clearly in need of proper care and protection, so it is your legal and moral duty to act to protect your child from the mother’s or any other person’s wrongful acts towards  her, or putting her in situations of danger or which are potentially dangerous.
• You must also ask for an application to be included that the mother stops using her current partner’s surname for your daughter instead of yours, which is her legal name, and thereby causing confusion in the child’s mind; and also that the mother is committing a fraud by doing so, or at least a misrepresentation of your child  existing legal name.  So you need a clear order that the mother must stop this immediately.

So go to the Family Court of your parish with a certified copy of your child’s birth certificate and inform the clerk that you need to make an application for orders to be made for  the protection of your very young child and for you to have your rights and obligations as her father honoured by the mother and detail all the facts about the mother’s conduct.

If you do not have a certified copy of your child’s birth certificate, go and get one and pay the extra cost for it to be delivered to you urgently.   You must do all you can to quickly get your summons and affidavit in support prepared, filed and served on the mother.   You dare not delay to protect your daughter.  Please move as quickly as you  can.

You can appear yourself, but if you feel nervous about it, have the summons and affidavit done and filed and served and you can then get a lawyer to represent you and your child at the hearing.    But if you cannot afford this, do not worry.  Do it yourself.

Do not be afraid, all you need to do is speak respectfully and clearly state what is happening to the judge, and explain your fear and concern for your child. It is up to you to use the law which exists to protect your rights and those of your child.  I wish you and your daughter the very best.

Margarette May Macaulay is an attorney-at-law, Supreme Court mediator, notary public, and women’s and children’s rights advocate. Send questions via e-mail to allwoman@ jamaicaobserver.com. All responses are published. Mrs Macaulay cannot provide personal responses.