The wedding night: Drunkenness, fatigue and failure to launch
IT’S the stuff of romance novels — Prince Charming sweeps you off your feet, wows you, weds you and ravishes you on your wedding night. Many brides-to-be dream of this night; it’s the time when two will become one for ever and ever, and when you’ll get to know each other, legally, at the beginning of a new life together.
But more and more couples are finding that the wedding night story is happening the day or even days after, as wedding stress, fatigue and other factors keep them from wedding night fire.
So what happened on your wedding night? The readers below share.
Keisha J, married nine years:
We didn’t have sex. We were too tired. We fell asleep in the hotel room after cuddling and marvelling at how we were really going to be living together.
Andrene W, married two years:
We were both too exhausted to have relations. We drove down to Portland from Kingston and we were so tired that we just fell asleep when we got to the hotel. We didn’t have sex until the following morning.
Natalia B, married one year:
We both got carried away at the reception, him more than me. By the time we got to the room he didn’t even know what his name was, he had had so much to drink. He went promptly to sleep. Next morning he had a hangover and didn’t feel well until about midday. We didn’t consummate the marriage until the following night.
Ann-Marie H, married 11 years:
Well I would hardly call it sex. I know I was so tired from the whole planning and the wedding itself that as soon as I got home I fell asleep across the bed which was packed with presents. Some time after that I just felt someone on top of me. I think my husband was exhausted himself but felt it was his duty to consummate it. I just lay there praying for him to finish so I could go back to sleep. It probably lasted two minutes, if you ask me!
Ingrid W, married three years:
I wasn’t tired at all, but I don’t know why he couldn’t get excited. I tried everything but he claimed it was fatigue that caused his problem. That was a disappointment. Next morning we finally managed to consummate the marriage.
Richard M, married seven years:
We had sex, but the details are a whole different story. I went and put on ‘long love’ condom and it numbed me up. I couldn’t feel a damn thing, even when I took it off. A good half hour passed before I could do anything, but I think it was great for my wife.
Diana S, married one year and four months:
We were exhausted. In fact I felt as if something was wrong with me because I felt it was the most natural thing to want to make love to your husband as soon as you got married. Persons I know who got married before always appeared as if they could not wait to get their hands on each other. But there I was tired and miserable, sex was the farthest thing from my mind. Fortunately, I had a very understanding husband. In fact, we didn’t do it until the next night.
Ruth P, married 15 years:
My cause is probably different from everybody else’s. We were both Christians and virgins and I don’t think either of us knew what to do. We just sat there looking at each other and talking. Long story. But the long and short of it is that it wasn’t until three weeks later that we finally consummated the marriage — after we went a doctor and she sent us home, told us what to do, and said we were not to come back to her until we did! Everytime my husband and I talk about it now we have to just laugh. Now we can’t get enough of each other.
David M, married 11 years:
We were tired but we mustered up the strength to do it without any fear or favour.
Curtis H, married two years:
My wife was too tired. Of course if it was up to me I would have, because we hadn’t had sex months before that. So of course I was really looking forward to it. But she was the one who did all the running up and down in organising the wedding so that night I could see she was drained. I knew I would have her for the rest of my life so I just cuddled up to her and slept. The next day was a different story.
