How I found out my partner cheated
INFIDELITY, when it occurs, is usually the one thing that will drive a wedge in your relationship and eventually break it apart.
Finding out your partner is cheating can be devastating, and often the confrontation ends up being explosive. However, when you have the full dirt on an unfaithful partner, it’s enough ammunition to take control and bring the third- party operation down.
But gathering evidence is no easy feat, and it may even take months before you have enough to confront your partner and not seem paranoid.
Below, people tell the moment their investigation proved fruitful.
Renee D:
I thought I had the best relationship, the strongest one, and I thought my partner was faithful. “My ride and die”, that’s what I called him, until I realised I was dying slowly and alone. How? He used to talk with me about everything, bring me on random walks, drive-outs, and we would drive up to Red Hills or Jack’s Hill and enjoy the scenery. Suddenly all that stopped. Plus there were no more goodbye kisses or hugs. I used to allow him to use my postpaid phone until I got a huge bill and had to call the service provider. I saw over 1,500 texts and hours of calls to a number I did not know. I called it and just used my head on the woman and said, ‘This is Jim’s secretary. He said to meet him at Emancipation Park by the statue today’. I went and there she was. She kept calling my phone as she thought it was his. I introduced myself to her and she kept apologising as she had no clue I existed. I went home, packed his bags, and left him a note to leave my home. Months later he was still calling me trying to reconcile, but once a cheater, always a cheater. No second chances.
Kareem J:
She would still communicate with her ex, but I always had a problem with it. She played me for two months. Her ex had been asking to get back together and she did, because of the bond they shared. I found out when he texted her asking for ’round two’ and she decided to forward the message to her friend. They would sit and laugh at my ignorance. But the message came to my phone by accident. When I asked her about it she started to cry, but I felt betrayed because I accommodated her ‘attachment issues’ while she used it against me.
Anthoniel A:
I had access to his e-mails and Facebook account. For the seven years I was married I never once invaded his privacy, though I could. In my estimation if a man gives you all his passwords, he’s not hiding anything. But he was thinking just like me and did it because he knew I would not look as I was saying he wouldn’t give me the key to the secrets. They say the best way to hide something is in plain sight, and that’s what he did. It was when he started staying out late, sleeping out and saying he was with his brother (who covered for him) that I remembered I had a few passwords and tried them. They worked, and I went through all his messages and e-mails, printed them off, and showed them to him. He confessed he had been unfaithful for two years and had an outside child in that time. I simply filed for a divorce and moved out.
Mark W:
My job requires that I travel frequently. I found out when she was no longer eager to come on trips. Once one of my trips was shortened but I decided not to tell her. I planned to use the opportunity to bring her back something nice and surprise her, like a good husband should. When I got to our apartment a car was parked in my spot so I parked at the guest section and decided to let it slide. Thinking back, maybe I should have just stayed on the trip and enjoyed myself, because when I went inside, I saw the act, plain as day, in my bed.
Richard D:
Well, my ex-girlfriend was very straightforward. She came to me and said, “Listen, I’m cheating with that friend who I invite to dinner, make you drop home when you pick me up, and invite to all your parties. I thought him being everywhere and how close we were would have given you the hint, but you wouldn’t take the hint so I’m telling you.” She moved out two weeks after.
