Her Tom, Dick, Harry and Barry

At the onset, everything is rosy in a new relationship, as one or both partners put on their best face to appeal to the other’s affections. Only when things get serious, most times, are some secrets revealed, and sometimes it’s years later, when much is invested, that news of children, crazy spouses, restraining orders and debt come to the fore.

Joshua, 40:

Sometimes we men don’t see the writing on the wall in the early stages of being in a relationship with a woman. I know a bredren and it’s only after a few years that he found out that the girl couldn’t get pregnant. He was so distraught. I felt it for him.

Ian, 37:

Sometimes the young people, when they’re getting serious about a relationship or are thinking about marriage, don’t do thorough background checks on their paramours. A coworker only found out about his would-be-wife’s debt history when they went in to get a loan for their marriage expenses. He was lucky to find it out before he put the ring on her finger. The real truth about your mate can only come out after a certain period of time, and that is why I encourage people to wait before making major life decisions like marriage.

Junior, 39:

Back in the old days many women would come from the country areas and try to make a life in Kingston for themselves. Most times no one knew their history. And so certain things like children they left behind in the country, didn’t even enter the equation while you were dating them.

Courtney, 35:

Some women are liars. They just use you to see what they can get. It’s only after time passes that you will find out about every Tom, Dick, Harry and Barry she has been with in the past.

Donovan, 38:

When you meet a woman, I would say that for the first six months it’s all a show. Not even poop she’ll want to poop in your presence. That nuh normal! These young girls, when they’re inviting a man over, they will clean up the place especially for him.