How to know you’re dating a MARRIED MAN
THOUGH a simple check at the Registrar General’s Department will reveal the information, and though often the signs are as clear as day, many women continue to date married men and when things get sticky, they’ll use the excuse, “I didn’t know.”
Along with the signs, there is usually that gut feeling called intuition which is hardly ever wrong, which will tell you that the man who’s interested in you is too good to be true. Chances are he’s hiding a wife and family.
Reverend Dr Alvin Bailey, president of the Jamaica Evangelical Alliance, said there are some clear-cut signs that a man is married or might not be devoted to his partner. These include a reluctance to entertain a real relationship.
“You will observe that the couple operates at different speeds and the man always has a kind of private life. The level of enthusiasm about the relationship is not usually reciprocated,” he said.
Other signs include:
1. His available time
According to divorced 34-year-old Kevin Green, one clear sign is the time he’s able to spend in your company. “If he can’t stay out past a certain hour, or sleep over or spend weekends with you, then he has another partner or he is married,” Green said.
2. The relationship is secret
Dr Bailey said it is important to know his friends and make the relationship public. “Talk about it publicly. Remember you only have one pair of eyes, ears and feet. If your friends know about him you will get extra pairs of eyes, ears and feet who will tell you what’s happening,” he said. If he insists on the relationship remaining in the dark, chances are he is married.
3. You don’t know where he lives
Having been in the situation before, 25-year-old Kerene Johnson said if a man won’t tell you where he lives, forbids your visits, or insists on hanging out at a hotel or some distant place, then he’s not single.
4. He has a ring mark
Possibly the most obvious sign a man is married is the presence of a ring. While he may not wear it when he is pursuing you, the ring might have left a mark paler than his skin colour. Look for it.
5. Look at his pictures
If you have access to his Facebook or Instagram account or you’ve been to his office, do a quick glance and observe his photographs. He may have his daughter on his desk, a family photo, and chances are Facebook and Instagram will have vacation and wedding photos.
6. Holidays are off limits
If you want to spend the New Year or Christmas with him and it’s a no-no, then chances are you might be dating someone who is married.
7. You have a gut feeling
Nothing beats a woman’s intuition. Don’t write off the voice in your head or your gut feeling as paranoia. If you feel something is wrong, chances are it is.
8. He’s a pro at parenting
We’re not saying that men can’t be doting parents too, but if your new man can diagnose your child’s illness to a T; knows the use of Cataflam and what’s the correct dosage; and can tell you that your child has a strep throat or ear infection and he’s not a doctor, then he may have been getting practice elsewhere — like with his family at home.
— KH
